This past Thanksgiving Bruce and I weren’t able to celebrate with any members of our family due to an upper respiratory infection and stomach bug. It was probably the first Thanksgiving without family in a few decades. It gave me compassion for those who for various reasons regularly experience the holiday without their family. I was so sad yesterday that we weren't able to join our kids and grandkids at the beach but knew I had two choices…I could stew and feel sorry for myself or I could take captive my emotions and do something good for my soul. I decided to begin decorating my house for Christmas, unloaded the tree and collected all the decorations from years past. As the day unfolded so did my gratitude for blessings that God has given me the other 364 days of each year. I was overwhelmed thinking about my life since His first holy breath entered my lungs. But then, I opened a drawer to retrieve the last of my decorations and there it was…the most painful Christmas ornament ever…a little porcelain Christmas tree that encased a ball that jingled around when moved. At first glance you would not think anything special of this ornament, but my glance is a little different.
This ornament hung from the IV pole of my sister’s constant companion in the Hospice House a few months before she died. Ten years ago, next month this ornament rattled with every move she made as if it was reminding us that life still existed. As the family members took their turn sleeping on the pull-out sofa in her room, we all came to know the constant jingle this ornament made. One night I had actually fallen asleep only to be awaken by the jingle of the little tree atop the pole. With the back light behind her, I saw her frail silhouette making her way towards the mini-fridge to sneak a gulp of chocolate milk. Then I saw her turn slowly holding onto the pole and gaining her strength she slowly made her way back to the bed all the while the ornament reminding me that she was still among us…she was still a part of our Christmas season…she was still on earth and not yet in Heaven.
But this morning as I sit here in the dark staring at my newly decorated tree and considering the most painful Christmas ornament ever…a quiet ornament that should be jingling...I am reminded of God’s faithfulness. This morning the ornament jingles in my heart in ways it never has before. Its message is Scriptural…it’s holy…it’s eternal...but most of all it's message is for you and for me. It reminds me that everything God did for her ten years ago was to prosper her instead of harming her and now she enjoys the perfection of Heaven. (Jeremiah 29:11) It reminds me that because of Christ she has overcome this world and so will I (John 16:33). It reminds me that we are not to be surprised when trouble and suffering find us because Jesus told us we would experience tough things (1 Peter 4:12) It reminds me that the devastating things we might be experiencing will become old things…former things…past pain replaced with new seasons…joyful seasons…hopeful futures (1 Peter 4:12). It reminds me that Jesus has gone to make a place for me and for you and He will come back and take us to that place (John 14:3). It reminds me that God never left Beth once in her intense suffering and He won't leave us in our despair (De 31:6).
I think I will shake the little ornament daily throughout the Christmas season as if I have found the ultimate Advent item. With each jingle God’s promises speak and with each view of that little porcelain Christmas tree I will be reminded of God’s ultimate will for each of us…to get us all home with Him where sin and suffering aren’t invited to the celebration.
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