Comings and Goings

Hagar, where have you come from and where are you going?” Genesis 16:8

This was the story of an Egyptian slave woman who worked in the home of Abram and Sarai. Abram and Sarai had tried for the longest period of their lives to conceive. Sarai concocted this plan to build a family through the slave woman, and commanded Abram to marry and impregnate Hagar. The plan flawlessly worked, until Sarai found herself so jealous of Hagar that she began to treat her with contempt. Her treatment of the young slave girl was so bad that Hagar ran away. She was kneeling by a stream in the wilderness, distraught no doubt. The beautiful words of the messenger from God both encourage me, and haunt me. ‘Where have you come from and where are you going?’ It encourages me because I know that God sees my life spread out before Him. He knows the challenges from which I’ve come, along with the failures that defined certain seasons. Faithfully, He brought me through them and never left me alone. He knows what is up ahead and the circumstances that He is arranging to get me there. But it also somewhat haunts me to answer the question of where I’ve been. I’ve been selfish…I’ve been sinful…I’ve been dishonest…I’ve been neglectful of my fellowship with Jesus. I’m certainly not proud of some of the past ‘whereabouts’ but I’m certain of where I am now. I am forgiven…I am pursued …I am cleansed through Christ…chosen by God…empowered by the Holy Spirit. I find myself at this point living in the tension of this question. Maybe God has me in the between to show me things about myself. Maybe He has me sitting tight because for me to discover my ‘where I’m going,’ circumstances must be arranged.

“God sets the pace. He won’t move you in step with your fellow sojourners. Sometimes you’ll feel like you’re getting left behind. Other times you’ll feel like you’re leaving them behind. That’s just it. Going always involves some measure of leaving. Or God may keep you indefinitely in the same place, but if you walk with Him you cannot remain the same person. There is still the going.” The Quest, Beth Moore, p. 50. And that is precisely the point! God is more concerned with who we have become when we arrive than where we are going. Sometimes standing still is still moving…moving in our faith…moving in our resolve…moving in our transformation.

I can’t wait to see where God is taking me and taking you. As we wave our goodbyes to where we have come from, we squint our eyes to see where He is taking us. And hopefully we will never be the same.

“The LORD will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.” Psalm 121:8.

When Bones Rattle

“The hand of the LORD was on me…and...by his Spirit…set me down in the middle of the valley; it was full of bones. He led me around them…and they were very dry. ‘Son of man, can these bones live?’ I replied, ‘Lord God, only you know.’” Ezekiel 37:1-3.

Over the past few years, it has been a season from heaven and hell for me. It has been my highest of highs spiritually speaking, but my lowest of lows in the earthly realm. I can relate to Ezekiel being set down right in the middle of a valley of dead bones. It was a season where I looked around and saw things drying up that previously flourished. It was one of the loneliest years I’ve ever experienced. There were certainly a few beautiful souls that God surrounded me with to lead me around in the valley. There were times I felt buried alive and questioned everything. I didn’t know what would result in the end, but I am so humbled and eternally grateful for the freedom God brought to me through this valley. He forced me to look at everything that previously motivated me, asking me ‘Can these bones live?’ He was showing me that things that used to hold power over me have no real power. No relationship can thrive without the breath of God…no circumstance can occur without His permission…nothing can have a pulse without the Creator’s hand. I have never been happier for a season to end. But, in some odd way there are melancholy moments where I reminisce about the moment to moment fellowship upon which I became so dependent. I was guilty of having the same attitude as the people in Ezekiel 37:11, “Look how they say, ‘Our bones are dried up, and our hope has perished.’ But God said, ‘Prophesy and say… ‘God says: I am going to open your graves and bring you up…and lead you into the land.’” (v. 12) God did just that! Once I began telling Him that my pleasure and approval was in Him, I began experiencing precious grace and life in places I thought were dead. I heard rumblings of mercy and grace was extended in unlikely places. Places where Satan had held power became the dried-up bones. I watched the beautiful exchange of dead things coming to life, and old attitudes drying up. I depend completely on God now who gives life and reconciles all things. I have so much more to learn, but I pray for my heart to be like an empty canvas, postured to have His beauty splashed upon its surface.

So, I ask you this morning, ‘Can your bones live?’ Can you reclaim your joy and walk with God out of your valley of dry bones? Can you claim with confidence that your past will no longer hold power over your present or future? Will you truly believe that whatever has dried up can be made yours again? Will you allow God to lead you around the dead bones, and show you how to bring the wounded parts of your heart to life again? Will you believe that He can ‘open up your graves and bring you up to a new land?’ You will never see life as you have seen it before once God restores those places in your heart that have been off limits to Him. He always goes after the most wounded parts of our hearts, with the loving intention of healing and walking in the freedom of His power.

“There was a noise, a rattling sound, and the bones came together, bone to bone… ‘Then you will know that I am the LORD. I have spoken, and I will do it.’” Ezekiel 37:13b

Dreamers in Waiting

And he told this parable: “A man had a fig tree planted in his vineyard, and he came seeking fruit on it and found none. And he said to the vine dresser, ‘Look, for three years now I have come seeking fruit on this fig tree, and I find none. Cut it down. Why should it use up the ground?’ And he answered him, ‘ Let it alone this year also, until I dig around it and put on manure. Then if it should bear fruit next year, well and good.’” Luke 13:6-9.

There is a woman who planted her dreams in a vineyard. Each morning she would walk among them intently looking for buds on the vines. Some vines she stood in front of enjoying the fullness of their fruit…fully realized and fully experienced. She realizes that a smile has stretched across her face as she remembers the day it first showed growth. But as she walked towards a row of unanswered prayers and unfulfilled dreams the heaviness of her heart burdened her. She searched for any sign but the tears welled up in her eyes making it difficult to see. She realized that the vine dresser was always following her through her vineyard. She didn’t mind because she knew He had that special touch for the vineyard bringing every vine into fruition. Some days she was overwhelmed at all the fruitful dreams the works of His hands had produced. But, some days she had sadness in her eyes and that long enduring desire in her heart. She explained to Him that there was a vine she has been watching for years, and she never saw any evidence of fruit. She questioned what was even the point. Why should it use up space in her vineyard? Because, the vine dresser knows the perfect plan for that dream. He knows that when He digs around in the circumstances, He must add the fertilizer while removing the bad roots. But, even today she has a heart to keep asking, keep searching, keep looking for fruit. He encourages her to walk among the vines that bring her pleasure and joy until the fullness of the other ones become ripe for the gathering.

We all have dreams and unanswered prayers, but we must understand that focusing on the unfulfilled might cause us to miss out on the joy of the fulfilled ones we are presently experiencing. Continued prayers for our dreams are never a waste of ground when approaching God. He encourages us throughout His word to keep on asking…keep on seeking…keep on knocking. He knows the wonderful plans that He has for each of us, and when the time is right and the circumstances are perfectly aligned we will receive His best in all things.

“God proves to be good to the man who passionately waits, to the woman who diligently seeks.” Lamentations 3:25.

When We Are Seen

‘Can anything good come…?’ ‘Come and see.’ Philip answered. ‘How do you know me?’ Nathaniel asked. ‘Before Philip called you, when you were under the fig tree, I saw you.’” John 1:46-48.

Prior to Nathaniel’s decision to follow Jesus, he was hanging out at his house sitting under the fig tree. His friend Philip had just discovered Jesus and had inquired as to where Jesus was staying. He believed that Jesus was the fulfilled prophesy of the Messiah, and didn’t want to lose track of Him. Philip must have been so excited to go and tell his friend. His joy was quickly diminished when Nathaniel answered through the heart of skepticism and prejudice. ‘Can anything good come out of Nazareth?’ What had happened in Nathaniel’s past that made him so cynical about the hope of a Savior? What experience molded and shaped his heart that he was willing to miss out on the Promised One? Philip urged him to ‘Come and see!’ As he approached Jesus, he discovered that he was already known by this man from Nazareth. Jesus told him that he had seen him sitting under the fig tree. How could this be? When was Jesus even around? Did he hear his heart of prejudice and disbelief?

In some ways I have been Nathaniel sitting under a shade of skepticism. At the end of my prayers, I say ‘Amen’ only to walk away saying ‘Is anything good really going to even come out of this?’ I have waded through waters of hope…pools of disappointment…dashed dreams and unresolved circumstances. In thinking of Nathaniel’s posture of disbelief, I realize that God gives me a choice each morning. When I arise will I choose to sit under the weight of disbelief and stagnant prayers, or will I ‘Go and see!’ like Philip urges? Will I stand up against my past experiences of unanswered prayers, and open my eyes to the prayers He has answered? Will I keep asking…keep seeking…keep knocking since I know where Jesus lives. He lives within me and He lives within you. He only has good and perfect gifts for us as it relates to our spiritual growth. We all know loss and devastation, but will we sit down under the fig tree and become spiritually suspicious and hardhearted? When we understand that Jesus sees us in our pain and disappointment, we can know that He will not leave us alone. Even when we fail to choose Him, He still chooses us in every moment of every day.

‘You did not choose me, but I chose you.’ John 15:16.

Eating the Lies

“Who told you that…?” Gen 3:13b

Since the fall of mankind in the Garden of Eden God has been asking every generation this question. Sin and death were ushered in with a lie from Satan. A bite from the hand of the tempter will never just be a nibble. It will be a bite that eventually becomes an appetite. I know for myself it has been a lifelong struggle to reprogram the lies I brought with the truth God extends. ‘The serpent deceived me, and I ate…’ Gen 3:13b. The lies I digested from him included that I wasn’t smart enough…wasn’t good enough… wasn’t liked enough. He also told me that I would feel better if I just bought something. He told me that there was no need to tell Bruce about certain things. He told me that I didn’t have to forgive and that I was entitled to hold onto my resentment. He told me that being a Christian wasn’t fun enough … I wasn’t worthy enough…I wasn't pure enough. But God waged war in February of 2006 and began asking me this question…Who told you that? Through prayer and meditation, He helped me see that His word runs counter parallel to the lies. He told me that I was smart enough through His wisdom. He told me that I was good enough because Christ was great. He reminded me to forgive as I was forgiven. He taught me that honesty begins with a choice and that it should always be on my lips. He showed me that being a Christian is an adventure, so to keep my heart open and to hold the things of this world loosely. He told me that while I have the rest of my life to be transformed, He will provide everything needed until He ushers me home to heaven.

So, I ask you this morning…what lies have you eaten from Satan? Have you tasted the lies that you are unlovable…unforgivable…unemployable? Do you continue to return to the fruit tree of the lie that God is unable to save…unable to grant…unable to forgive...unable to redeem? ‘Who told you that?’ God’s word of truth can undo any lies of Satan. While Satan's power is demonstrated in lies, God’s power is demonstrated in truth. When you are tempted to bite the apple, open the Word and allow God to tell you your worth. I have watched my own children wrestle with the lies of Satan. He cares nothing about the age, the generation, the gender, the race or our origin. He only cares about his selfish pursuit to have us believe everything opposite of who God created us to be. So, if we are going to take a bite, lets open our mouths and eat the life-giving word of God.

“Your words were found and I ate them, And Your words became for me a joy and the delight of my heart; For I have been called by Your name, O LORD God of hosts.” Jeremiah 15:16

A Questioning Heart

“This is what the LORD says: They stopped asking, ‘Where is the LORD…?’” Jeremiah 2:5a, 6a

Last year, my sisters and I couldn’t find our mother no matter what phone we called. We talked back and forth, texted back and forth and began feeling anxious. Over the course of the next little while, Benay got word that someone had seen an ambulance in the driveway. She followed up with the local hospital who confirmed Mother was in the emergency room. It turnedout being a severe allergic reaction, so they treated here, tested her and eventually sent her home. She had not told us because she didn’t want to alarm us. Needless-to-say, we gave her specific directions for future emergencies! I thought of this event when I read this verse today. God was well aware His people had stopped asking for Him. They no longer looked for Him in their daily circumstances. I believe there is nothing worse than feeling like you are not missed…not considered…not pursued for relationship. I can’t imagine how Mother would have felt if none of us even missed her. What would she have thought if she had to take a taxi home, realizing that no one searched for her during this time?

I believe that the heart of God was deeply grieved that no one was looking for Him. They had quit asking ‘Where are you, Lord’? They no longer pursued His spirit, sought His presence or looked for His involvement. When we quit asking God where He is, we quit searching for Him. God knows the moment we no longer question Him is the moment our hearts and minds start searching for substitutions. God has told us where He is, but that is in print on a page in the Bible. He desires us to form the question and search for Him in all our circumstances. He wants to reveal Himself to us in the good and sweet times…the mundane and the chaotic times…the confusing and the calm times. He is always with us, sometimes leading us and other times asking us to lead in faith as He acts as our rear guard. We discover by our verse this morning that the heart of God desires us to question Him. To question is to care…to question is to fellowship…to question is to learn…to question is to love and be loved.

"Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast." Psalm 139:7-10.

From the Whirlwind

"Then the LORD answered Job from the whirlwind. He said, ‘Who is this who obscures my counsel with ignorant words? Get ready to answer me like a man; when I question you, you will inform me.” Job 38:1-3.

I have never noticed until this morning the book of Job is primarily made up of a series of questions between Job and his circle of influence. ‘Why is this happening? Whose fault is it? What can be done to change these circumstances? What if…?’ I find it interesting that 37 of the 42 chapters Job spent such futile energy and heightened emotion on discussing God instead of just approaching God. They gnawed on that bone until God had heard enough. Job 38:1 ushers in the exasperated question from God to a group of talkers who lack knowledge on everything. ‘Who are you listening to?’ By the time God spoke the circumstances had elevated to the description of a whirlwind.

How many of us are also guilty of spending our majority of time either talking about our problems, questioning the reason they are happening, or attempting to fix our problems in our own strength? Hours wasted sitting on our phone on hold for an answer as God sits on hold waiting for us. Hours searching the internet while God longs to be found? He cannot answer if we do not ask…He cannot be found if we do not seek…He cannot open if we do not knock. We receive little because we ask little, and then we are shocked and angered when nothing changes. We walk through our situations as victims instead of hikers. We feel that we have been done to, instead of walking with God in confidence that He is doing some critical work in our lives. We try to master over our circumstances in the rouse that we will have control. We will only have the control over our experiences that God allows. ‘Every single season of defeat is driven by lies.’ The Quest, Beth Moore, p. 11. The lie says that we can handle all our challenges when Truth says, ‘You were never meant to handle this, but to place it in God’s hands.’ The lie tells us that we have been victims, while Truth says 'You have victory in Christ.' The lie says that justice isn’t being served in our situation when Truth says, ‘Christ didn't experience His earthly justice, so our eternal justice could win in the end.’

For every question we have for man, God has an answer for us. He invites us to question Him directly, especially since He already knows the question, and already has the answer. ‘Asking is a form of intimacy.’ The Quest. I believe that the FAQ between Father and child is an act of worship, trust and revelation. Allow God to speak to you from your whirlwind and then lift your questions to Him in worship, reverence and anticipation of His answer.

'Call to Me and I will answer you, and I will tell you great and mighty things, which you do not know.' Jeremiah 33:3.