Dependent Upon Man

“When Jesus saw him lying there and learned that he had been in this condition for a long time, he asked him, ‘Do you want to get well?’   ‘Sir…I have no one to help me.’  Then Jesus said to him, ‘Get up!  Pick up your mat and walk’ John 5:6-8. 

I have read this story several times and just discovered something I previously had not considered.  The place was Bethesda, a pool believed to have healing waters once stirred.  Surrounding this pool were many sick people lying around waiting for their tiny window of miracle and deliverance.  We are not told how long this man had been attempting to be healed.  What we are told is that he was lying on a mat waiting for someone to help. (I have no one to help me)  One big mistake that had prevented him from healing was his belief that healing came through man.

In my 30’s I so desperately desired to be accepted in a community which was extremely closed to outsiders.  If you were not born in this community you were welcomed but not really accepted.  Time and time again I reclined on my mat of rejection, awaiting the time where hearts would be stirred and acceptance would be mine.  Tiny windows opened but no one ever moved me to the pool of acceptance.  It wasn’t until circumstances became so public and extreme with my daughter’s rebellion that healing came to me.  Jesus knew that my healing would not come through the waters of acceptance but through the deliverance from a Savior who would comfort, accept and lavish me with His love.  His requirement of me was not to move into the waters for these were not life giving waters.  His command was for me to get up and walk with Him.  Although I thought the healing waters would come from the acceptance of those in my community, they came from a different pool…they came from Living Waters.

Several decades later this community has changed its face as so many people have moved into the area.   I love my community and feel completely a part of this amazing place but this acceptance didn’t come from the stirring of the pool…it came from God’s stirring of my heart.

‘Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God?  Or am I trying to please men?  If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ.’ Gal. 1:10. 

As Mercy Gathers Dust

“…for he satisfies the thirsty and fills the hungry with good things.” Psalm 107:1

We have all done it.  Open the fridge and stare…throw open the pantry doors and scan… go shopping and browse.  What are we looking for?  What hunger are we trying to fill?  Why are we so thirsty?  Are we just bored or do we really crave?

Every child was born with an appetite and thirst for the One who held that child in His hands prior to birth.  There is a craving and comfort that we search for that can only be found when we seek our Creator.  From birth we have growling in our spirit that longs for something to fill us up.  We respond to those hunger pains with food from the world.  We open our earthly pantries and reach for power, moving humility to the back.  We open a can of judgment while mercy gathers dust.  Our pantries which should be filled with heart healthy items are cluttered with self-made indulgences.

When we look to Christ who fills us with the good things…peace, joy, contentment and satisfaction we will begin to be heart healthy.   When we look to God to satisfy that insatiable thirst for something different we will find refreshment.  There will be seasons of thirst and seasons of satisfaction but we will always find the good things of God apart from our circumstances. 

Once we truly pursue the power of God our spiritual pantries will be full of the things of the Spirit…boxes and boxes of grace…cans stacked upon cans of forgiveness…bags full of compassion and mercy.  It will not matter what mood we are in for when we open our pantries everything we reach for will be heart healthy.

Seekers & Finders

“But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well” Matthew 6:33.

When our children were young it never ceased to amaze me that after a few minutes of looking for their lost item they were resolved to quit looking.  I am not sure if this occurred because the item wasn’t really that important to begin with or because they knew I would find it for them.  Either way their search was halfhearted due to their lack of interest or their lack of priority.

In considering my life this morning I was that child that said I wanted God in my life but wasn’t really seeking Him for my life.  Much like my children, I deferred to others to bring God to me.  The definition for seeking is ‘trying to locate or discover…to go toward.’    We should notice that seek in its true definition means active movement on our part towards a discovery.  God invites us to discover Him and move more deeply with Him.  When I began truly moving towards Him and His word through daily study and worship the discoveries were constant and precious.  It was like someone handed me a treasure map in 2006 promising me relics at every turn if I would only seek.  The discoveries and treasures that have been mine over the past 7 years have built a storehouse of blessings and revelations.  The things that God has given me that the world never could will never pass away…His joy…His love…His peace…His protection and His amazing grace!  The map winds and twists but the place at the end is where the true treasure lies.  When I have discovered the things of God on earth it will be time for me to discovery the things of eternity. 

The gate will open and the light will be so brilliant from Christ’s radiance I won’t even notice that Daddy’s arms are extended towards me.  I won’t see that Beth is over by the waterfall playing nurse to the gentle animals in the field.  I will fail to hear the powerful worship service being held in the garden by my grandparents.  Those beautiful things will come in time but what I will be focused on is the met gaze between a creator and His creation…a sinner and a Savior… a daughter and her Father.  What are waiting for?  Why aren’t we seeking every moment of every day?  God promises His holiness and His abundance ‘on earth as it is in Heaven.’

‘Seekers become finders in the kingdom of God!’ Spirit Hunger, p. 59.

When Jesus Requested Prayer

“‘My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death,’ he said to them…Then he returned to his disciples and found them sleeping.  ‘Simon,’ he said to Peter, ‘are you asleep?  Could you not keep watch for one hour?  Watch and pray…’” Mark 14:37.

Whenever my children were young, when they heard me say Kristen Diane, Michael Walker or Caroline Marie they knew that I was displeased.  Jesus Himself had changed Simon’s name to Peter which in the Greek translation means rock.  So I find it interesting that when Peter defaults to his flesh and falls asleep, Jesus calls him Simon.  It is most likely because Simon sometimes acted like his old self instead of the rock God called him to be.  Can’t we all relate to this?   I can just hear the inflection in His voice with disbelief that Peter couldn’t hold his eyes open for even an hour.  Jesus was not only their teacher but He was their precious friend.  He was struggling …He was hurting.  He shared His deepest feelings with a select few and specifically asked them to join Him in prayer.  After pouring His heart out to His Father he returned to find His chosen friends asleep.  Jesus asked His friends to pray three different times that day to no avail, but did not judge them.  He was very aware of human weaknesses since He temporarily gave up His God status and became that of flesh. 

We have all been the one who uttered these words of despair, and we have all been the one who promised to pray and failed to…oops, we forgot…we dozed off.    Now I dare not judge because my grandmother could pray like nobody’s business.  I remember as a child when we would ask her to bless the food, every member of the family got blessed and a few people we never heard of.  It would not have been out of the realm of possibility that one of us fall asleep during one of her marathon prayers.  The point is that prayer is a gift we give each other.  We need it so we ask…we are asked so we give.  The power of prayer is something that nothing else can replace.  Even if we know God’s will and it is disparaging, we pray.  Even if our circumstances look impossible, we pray.  Even if we have prayed the same prayer for a span of time…like Jesus…we repeat our prayers with confidence that they are being heard.  ‘Once more he went away and prayed the same thing’ Mark 14:39.

Prayer requires more than a repeated chain of thoughts and requests.  It requires sitting with God and really discussing some things…having an actual dialogue.  Speaking…pausing…listening… crying…laughing.  It involves taking His words and reading or speaking them back to Him so we show Him that we believe in those words.   It means that if no one else ever prayed for us God would have heard every desire in our heart from our very own lips…nothing left on the table.  He will respond to what we honestly and humbly bring before Him.  What we do not bring to Him cannot be taken by Him.  What we hold onto in the secret places of our hearts will come to light eventually, so why not bring it to Him immediately and continually?  He is our Father who desires to heal us in our inner places.

Take everything to Him in prayer no matter how many times it has already been spoken.  As we are Christian prayer partners may we keep watch over our brothers and sisters and cover them in prayer…even if we do fall asleep occasionally.

Fit For Duty

“Now there is at Jerusalem by the sheep market a pool.   In these lay a great multitude of impotent folk, of blind, halt, withered, waiting for the moving of the water…For an angel went down at a certain season into the pool, and troubled the water: whosoever then first after the troubling of the water stepped in was made whole of whatsoever disease he had." John 5:2-4 (KJV)

When I think of this image it brings sadness to my heart.  I can just picture steps leading down to this pool with all kinds of sick people lying on them.  They wait and watch for the angel to come and slowly walk into the water.  They anticipate the moment that the angel’s finger reaches down and stirs the water.  They are so sick and have such restrictive movement that when the water was stirred another one always beats them into the pool.  They watch someone else become whole as they remain wounded.  They are so sick of their sickness.

There lies a great multitude of withered and spiritually sick Christians.  They believe in the healing waters of Jesus and believe in His power for making their brokenness whole.  They watch for Jesus and pray that He will heal them.  What is sometimes misunderstood with broken people is that God stirs our hearts to serve out of the very wound that has defined us.  He doesn’t take it away but uses it to heal others which in turn heal our own wounds.  This stirring invites us to use our wounds and brokenness for the service of others.  In reading God Loves Broken People by Sheila Walsh she poses crucial questions for our consideration.  ‘What if our deepest wounds are the very places through which God’s mercy flows to others?  What if instead of trying to fix ourselves, we present ourselves – broken and flawed though we are – to be used as He sees fit, for His glory and our good?  What if the wounds we beg God to heal, the burdens we plead with Him to remove, are the very things that make us fit for His service?’ p. 130.

Through our brokenness, we have been well-trained.  Through His grace, we have been re-made.  Through our service we will be made whole.  ‘In loves service, only the wounded soldiers can serve’ The Angel That Troubled the Waters, Thornton Wilder.  We must remember that it takes us stepping into God’s stirring place for us to be made whole from our own spiritual sicknesses and past troubles. 

We must embrace that in God’s army all of His soldiers are wounded and through our wounds we become fit for duty!

...And Heaven Opened

“The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children.  Now if we are children, then we are heirs – heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ” Romans 8:16-17.

Being one of four siblings I am aware of how committed and dedicated this sub-community in the family can be.  I am extremely close with my sisters and any of us would do anything in this world for each other.  Our victories are shared in joy and our sufferings are shared in pain.  We laugh with each other and cry for each other, as the circumstances of our lives are interconnected.  We are co-siblings and co-heirs within our family.  We have been up close and personal with having to say goodbye to one of our precious members of this sacred community.  Society rarely gives much consideration to the loss of a sibling when measured up to losses.  But Christ Jesus does…

There was a co-heir with Christ named Stephen, who was described in the Bible as ‘a man full of God’s grace and power’ Acts 7:8.  He performed great wonders and miracles through the Holy Spirit, being the first Christian martyr as was recorded in the Bible.   ‘The text tells us that as the maddened crowd drew near Stephen kept his gaze steadily upward.  In the process he saw the glory of God, and he saw Jesus standing in the place of honor at God’s right hand.  Just before his death, however, Stephen saw Christ standing…Christ was not only present at the right hand of the Father, but he also was (at least in Stephen’s case) standing to receive his faithful servant home.  There can be no greater nor more honorable reception than to have the Son of Man standing at one’s entrance into his presence.  Steven saw the heavens opened.’  Life Application New Testament Commentary, p. 499.

…and so did my sister.  During the final two weeks of her life her gaze stayed steadily upward.  I watched her eyes narrow at whatever was appearing to her.  I witnessed her mouth spread with smiles as she was enjoying the company of those we could not see.  Were her eyes narrowing trying to shield Heaven’s light from the gates opening?  Was her face of joy because she saw her co-sibling rise to His feet to welcome her into the spiritual family?  That must have made it easier to let go of our hands to grab onto His hand.  Christ is aware of the pain of departing from family.  He hung on the cross and watched His mother suffer.  After His resurrection, He made sure that one of the ones to whom He appeared was His precious sibling.  He understood the power of that relationship and the Bible stays silent on their intimate exchange. 

“Precious in the sight of the LORD is the death of his saints” Psalm 116:15.  This is the balm for my soul that no one ever dies alone when in Christ.  I know that as our loved ones release our hands on earth they already have grabbed the hands of heaven’s loved ones in eternity.  I can only imagine those final moments on earth when the thin veil between heaven and earth is pulled back and ‘what I have only known in part…then I shall know fully.’ 1 Co 13:12b.

Earning An Enemy

“Then the priests who bore the ark of the covenant of the LORD stood firm on dry ground in the midst of the Jordan; and all Israel crossed over on dry ground, until all the people had crossed completely over the Jordan” Joshua 3:16-17.

I have always loved the story of Joshua and the Israelites crossing over into Jericho.  The people were commanded that when they follow the Ark of the Covenant carried by the priests they would cross over into their Promised Land.  They were to keep their eyes on the Ark, the dwelling place of God, and follow in the steps led by Yahweh.  I am sure it was exciting to be one of the sojourners walking on dry ground with the water ‘heaped up’ on both sides.  The walls of liquid must have been so high on each side that they couldn’t see anything to the left or to the right.  As they stepped from the riverbed to the bank it must have been overwhelming to realize that they were exactly where God had orchestrated for them to be – the place where God had promised and purposed for them.  Did they look at each other wide-eyed with smiles stretched broadly across their faces?  Did the little children run up ahead and taste the fruit from the land?  What did that initial excitement look like?  Did they realize that crossing into the land was going to be much easier than defending it?

This is not just a story to be read but a reality to be considered.  This is a story that you and I can cross over into with our own sandals.  When God formed each of us we were created with a purpose and a promised land.  We entered this world with a temporal promised land…God’s purpose for us on earth…and a heavenly promised land at the end of our lives.  When we surrender the fleshly things of this world God will provide a path for us to walk in the Spirit.  When we reach the banks of our own promised lands we must protect what we have been given.  We must be watchful and alert so that our old sins and weaknesses will not find us.  We cannot continue to allow ambushes of the flesh to overtake our newly attained spiritual land.  ‘The point is not just getting us into our proverbial lands of promise where we bear much fruit.  The point is developing the spiritual muscle on our way so once we receive it, we are strong enough to keep it.  The hardest part of possessing the land is defending it.  A person has hardly begun to have a real fight on her hands until she starts serving in her full-throttle giftedness and effectiveness.  She who proves a threat earns an enemy.’ James, p. 164.

May all of us have an enemy in our wake!

Princesses and Ballerinas

"Now listen, you who say, 'Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.' Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow.  What is your life?  You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.  Instead, you ought to say 'If it is the Lord's will, we will live and do this or that'" James 4:13-15.

When our children were little they would tell me the plans that they had for their lives.  Most of the time I was thoroughly entertained by their future plans because I knew it was just the imagination of a child.  They truly did believe that 'this or that' was the path of their little lives.  I played along and entertained their plans up to a point, but when their actions would take them away from the reality we had for their lives I would have to realign their thinking.  After all life is hardly a fairy tale.

James asks us to consider the same thing when thinking about our own lives.  God our Father has provided the backdrop for each of our lives and He orchestrates all of our movement.  ('For in Him we live and move and exist' Acts 17:28.)  He hears the dreams of our hearts and makes plans for our lives that will align our dreams with His dreams.  We can plan this or we can prepare for that but we must make room in our plans for surrenders and acceptances.  We must look to our Father with the same child like trust our own children did when we realigned their thinking.  We must embrace the fact that what God has planned for our lives is rooted in love, protection and a kingdom focus.   We must trust Him with more than our eternity in heaven...we must trust Him with our circumstances on earth.  If we have a child who is wayward we must surrender that child to the only Parent who can bring her around...God is Father.  If we are waiting on God to answer a dream we must adhere to God's timeline...God is Wisdom.  If we are pursuing something that is not materializing we must humbly accept His answer and trust Him...God is Protector.

As much as I love the beauty and flow of Jeremiah 29:11, I want it to be more in my life than something I post on someone's Facebook wall.  I want it to be something more than a verse I memorize.  I want Jeremiah 29:11 to flow through every vein in my body and saturate every thought that comes into my mind.  I want to really believe it...believe Him for it.  Help me Lord to not be so familiar with this passage that I forget it is very breath of the Divine.  Help me make it so personal to my own life that it will have new breath.

For you know what you planned for my individual life, Lord.  Your plans are precious, perfect and are for my protection.   You knew that some of your plans might be painful so you provided an assurance that you are not trying to hurt us. You allow them to bring me spiritual growth in You and precious riches for my life.  My future and eternity are both settled, and only You know how to navigate me to that perfect life.  I will hope in this knowledge.  Amen.

"'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the LORD, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future'" Jeremiah 29:11.

Friend Request

“The LORD spoke with Moses face to face, just as a man speaks with his friend” Exodus 33:23.

Growing up as a young teen, I always felt a little insecure when considering my different friendships.  As each of you are aware girls can be petty and fickle on any given day and teenage girls are professionals.  I was part of a group of friends and would always dread when I knew they were getting together without me.  I knew that the feeling of connection was directly related with our presence together.  When I wasn’t in their company I felt less secure and confident about those relationships.  Whenever I was physically with them I was privy to their conversations, plans and feelings.  Friendships span our entire lives but do we really know how to engage?  Friendship cannot be fostered without continual fellowship.

We are told that Moses spoke with God face-to-face, describing their relationship as a true friendship.  We know that Moses didn’t actually see God’s face but their relationship grew through experiencing each other presence-to-presence.  In today’s social climate we have virtual friendships, with fellowship being fostered through monitors and phones.  So I ask you and myself this morning…what are my friendship habits with God?  Do I communicate with God in a more social style climate or am I pursuing a presence-to-presence style intimacy?  Friendship should mean more than a click on the keyboard or a quickly pecked out text.  Friendship with God means we pursue presence-to-presence fellowship, being dissatisfied with a mediocre relationship with Him.  It means we desire to know His mind and pursue His purposes for our life.  It means sharing every aspect of our life with Him so we can experience real and intimate exchanges with Him.  ‘You and I are invited to come face-to-face or presence-to-presence with Christ, but that kind of intimacy only comes intentionally…no one who lives in this world is a friend of God accidentally.  We make a choice where we want to be present.  A hard choice.’ James, p. 137.

“I have called you friends, because I have made known to you everything I have heard from My Father” John 15:14.  Just as I couldn’t hear the thoughts and ideas of my friends when I was absent, we cannot hear God when we do not get into His presence.  ‘The unspeakably high privilege of friendship with God makes a person humble and friendship with the world makes a person proud.  The former He graces.  The latter He opposes.’ James, 137.

Petitions of Pleasures

“What causes fights and quarrels among you?  Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you?  You want something but don’t get it.  You kill and covet, but you cannot have what you want...When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures” James 4:1-3.

I remember many years ago we had the opportunity to move to Australia with Bruce’s employer.  This was during the time when I had secretly mounted up debt in our marriage and prayed for this move to happen.  A big bonus was promised along with the move so my motives were clearly centered around my desire to pay off this debt without being discovered.  I prayed for this move from the standpoint of how it could benefit me instead of how it could benefit the whole family.  Thankfully, my prayers were not answered.

Many times we ask God for things that fail to benefit the spiritual kingdom, promoting the desires of the earthly things.  The battle within us wages as we discover that to have that certain something is not aligned with God’s plan.  Our obsession to have ‘that thing’ kills every bit of contentment in our life.  We wrestle between what we want and what we cannot have.  This battle kills any bit of joy in our life that God intends us to discover.  We find ourselves detached from the compassion and plight of others, another casualty of this war from within.  Our failure to get what we want becomes our battle cry and distracts us from being focused on His will.

We must align our prayers with God’s plan and purpose.  If our petition primarily benefits our pleasures we should be prepared to fight this battle for a long time.  But if our petitions will bring glory to God and purpose to His kingdom work, it is simply a matter of time.  He wants to give His children all of the good things out of His glorious riches. 

The Three Testaments

“Then the LORD said to Moses, ‘Write down these words…And he wrote on the tablets the words of the covenant…When Moses came down from Mount Sinai with the two tablets of the Testimony…he was not aware that his face was radiant because he had spoken with the LORD” Exodus 34:27, 29.

By the time Moses received the Ten Commandments which would later be included in the Old Testament he was close to 80 years old.  He had spent most of life without the recognized fellowship with God that he now experienced.  After the burning bush experience he followed God completely and faithfully and the yield was just as much for us as it was for Moses and the people.  It is written that once Moses wrote the tablets of the Testimony the radiance of God was upon him that everyone witnessed. 

This got me thinking this morning about my own life.  When the direction of my life changed from me-focused to God-focused I began considering what God was doing in my daily attitudes and behaviors.  He was writing a new testament in my life and on my heart.  With each command to discontinue ‘this’ and take time for ‘that’ I felt freedom in places that had enslaved me and life in the graveyards of my heart. 

A testament is something that serves as tangible proof or evidence.  We only have to look as far as the radiance of the Lord on the face of Moses for our evidence.  God gave us the Old Testament through our ancestors and the New Testament as proof for the life of Christ Jesus.  But what about the third testament that is in the process of being written?  It is the living testament that is being written on your heart and on mine.  We are told to hold on tightly to the things that God reveals to us, and to tuck them securely in our hearts.  It is written that what God writes upon our hearts will be lifted to our minds through the Holy Spirit.  When this process happens we will reflect the beauty of Christ just as Moses did with God.  Our living testament will illuminate the radiance of God as we live out the commands written on our hearts. “Keep my commands and you will live; guard my teachings …write them on the tablet of your heart.” Proverbs 7:3

I am so grateful for the finished work of both the Old and New Testaments, and pray that each of us today will walk as living testaments giving proof to the power of God.