"The LORD has kept me from having children. Go, sleep with my maidservant; perhaps I can build a family through her." Genesis 16:2
These were the haunting words of Sarai, Abram's wife, when she arrived at the point of frustration with God for not granting her a son. She had prayed and prayed without results and decided to take matters into her own hands. At her direction, her husband slept with Hagar, the maidservant, and impregnated her, which eventually made Sarai so jealous she banished Hagar and her son Ishmael.
Waiting on God is the toughest spiritual practice we are asked to do. There are so many unseen purposes for our wait, some which will be revealed and some which will not. Impatience is the worst weapon to have in our arsenal because it is weapon we always use against ourselves. Many times our blessings are sabotaged because we are unwilling to wait on God to receive His best for us. Out of our impatience, we birth an Ishmael and create another obstacle to receiving His best. Impatience is another way of questioning God and His soveriegnty and begins to corrode our trust in Him. We replace our prayers and petitions with questions of God's character such as "Has He forgotten me?" and "Is He punishing me?".
Most of the time waiting on God means He is loving you and aligning you with the timing that will bring in the largest blessing. Our lives do not operate in a vacume. Our blessings and answered prayers must take other people into consideration as it affects their lives also. It is not just about us! Another reason for waiting upon God is that we are not ready to receive His fulfilled purpose and blessing. He knows when our hearts and minds are spiritually aligned with His to receive it and we will not be the recipient until this alignment takes place.
The question we must ask ourselves is "Am I surrendered to the wait or am I giving birth to an Ishmael?"
Saturday, May 30, 2009
Friday, May 29, 2009
Finding our Wings
"If we listened to our intellect, we'd never [love]. We'd never have a friendship. We'd never go into business, because we'd be too cynical. Well, that's nonsense. You've got to jump off cliffs all the time and build your wings on the way down." Annie Dillard quotes ThinkExist.com
I love this quote for it's inspiration and alignment with what God says. We can place anything in the [ ] above. God did not give us a spirit of fear - all fear comes from darkness. In place of fear God gave us power to accomplish anything we are called upon to do at His request. His expectations are courage and obedience. If He says to "stand down" and wait, we wait; if He says to jump we get a running start and jump. None of this is easy because we are wired to fear, wired to question, wired to respond based upon our experiences and not our goals.
My husband is extremely security oriented and had been with Duke Power Co. for twenty years. Bruce was extremely unhappy in his job and had been sending out resumes to no avail through a headhunter. All doors seemed to turn into brick walls. One day I had this revelation from God which showed a brick wall becoming a curtain of feathers. I immediately called my husband and told him that we were thinking in the wrong terms and felt we needed to consider opening a business. He had been toying with the idea also but faced it with great fear since this would place him in the middle of his biggest fear - one he had always tried avoiding. After much prayer my husband and I were being led by God to open a business which made us step way out of our comfort zone and jump off of the cliff. We had neither clients nor money but knew God was calling us to accomplish this.
Five years later God has continuously shown us his blessings on this business and leads us triumphantly through any fears, setbacks or frustrations from our leap of faith. I guess you can say that we have developed our baby wings and have faith that our wings will strengthen through His orchestration of our life.
I remember I used to climb a high diving board as a teenager with great hopes that I would finally jump. My courage climbing the ladder was quickly dashed when I got to the top and looked down and focused on the fall instead of the guaranteed catch. I would disgracefully turn around and climb back down the ladder. When God calls us to leap we fix our eyes upon Him and what He guarantees - not upon the freefall. Our logic and intellect will always be a barricade to our God ordained accomplishments.
Are you building your wings going down or do you turn around and climb back down that same old ladder?
I love this quote for it's inspiration and alignment with what God says. We can place anything in the [ ] above. God did not give us a spirit of fear - all fear comes from darkness. In place of fear God gave us power to accomplish anything we are called upon to do at His request. His expectations are courage and obedience. If He says to "stand down" and wait, we wait; if He says to jump we get a running start and jump. None of this is easy because we are wired to fear, wired to question, wired to respond based upon our experiences and not our goals.
My husband is extremely security oriented and had been with Duke Power Co. for twenty years. Bruce was extremely unhappy in his job and had been sending out resumes to no avail through a headhunter. All doors seemed to turn into brick walls. One day I had this revelation from God which showed a brick wall becoming a curtain of feathers. I immediately called my husband and told him that we were thinking in the wrong terms and felt we needed to consider opening a business. He had been toying with the idea also but faced it with great fear since this would place him in the middle of his biggest fear - one he had always tried avoiding. After much prayer my husband and I were being led by God to open a business which made us step way out of our comfort zone and jump off of the cliff. We had neither clients nor money but knew God was calling us to accomplish this.
Five years later God has continuously shown us his blessings on this business and leads us triumphantly through any fears, setbacks or frustrations from our leap of faith. I guess you can say that we have developed our baby wings and have faith that our wings will strengthen through His orchestration of our life.
I remember I used to climb a high diving board as a teenager with great hopes that I would finally jump. My courage climbing the ladder was quickly dashed when I got to the top and looked down and focused on the fall instead of the guaranteed catch. I would disgracefully turn around and climb back down the ladder. When God calls us to leap we fix our eyes upon Him and what He guarantees - not upon the freefall. Our logic and intellect will always be a barricade to our God ordained accomplishments.
Are you building your wings going down or do you turn around and climb back down that same old ladder?
Thursday, May 28, 2009
Recognizing a Hero
"It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery...You, my brothers, were called to be free." Galatians 5:1, 13.
A big part of being rescued is recognizing the hero when He sweeps in to rescue. When I think of Naomi, Ruth's mother-in-law, she was supplied a hero in her daughter-in-law as Ruth refused to leave her alone when Ruth's husband died. Naomi was so caught up in her own life and circumstances she was unable to see that God was sending Ruth as her hero. Thankfully, Ruth insisted on remaining and taking care of Naomi, being instrumental in the deliverence of a new life for both of them.
So many times we pray for rescue, we pray for deliverence and we pray for freedom from whatever enslaves us in our lives. We determine what our hero looks like and the manner through which we will be rescued so many times the hero comes and we miss it. This verse infers that freedom has already been granted through Christ and is not something to come. Freedom is a state of mind, not a deliverence from a problem. By "standing firm" as the verse states we guard our minds against this slavery returning. We enslave ourselves based on our fears and are asking for something that has already been given to us and a rescue that has already occurred. The hero has already come sweeping us up onto the white horse. But do we recognize that we are already galloping away to a new life of freedom or are we looking towards the horizon missing the horse we are already mounted upon?
I remember a story while visiting a support group of families of alcoholics many years ago which I will never forget. One father said that no matter what he did for his son he could not save him from himself. The father had given him all of the tools, support and resources needed to survive and be rescued from his addiction. He said it was like watching a person who thought they were drowning in 10 feet of water screaming for air and a life saving device when in reality he just needed to put his feet down in one spot and see that he was only in 3 feet of water.
His slavery was all in his head and recognizing the rescue was essential in the deliverence. Are you recognizing your rescue and claiming your freedom?
A big part of being rescued is recognizing the hero when He sweeps in to rescue. When I think of Naomi, Ruth's mother-in-law, she was supplied a hero in her daughter-in-law as Ruth refused to leave her alone when Ruth's husband died. Naomi was so caught up in her own life and circumstances she was unable to see that God was sending Ruth as her hero. Thankfully, Ruth insisted on remaining and taking care of Naomi, being instrumental in the deliverence of a new life for both of them.
So many times we pray for rescue, we pray for deliverence and we pray for freedom from whatever enslaves us in our lives. We determine what our hero looks like and the manner through which we will be rescued so many times the hero comes and we miss it. This verse infers that freedom has already been granted through Christ and is not something to come. Freedom is a state of mind, not a deliverence from a problem. By "standing firm" as the verse states we guard our minds against this slavery returning. We enslave ourselves based on our fears and are asking for something that has already been given to us and a rescue that has already occurred. The hero has already come sweeping us up onto the white horse. But do we recognize that we are already galloping away to a new life of freedom or are we looking towards the horizon missing the horse we are already mounted upon?
I remember a story while visiting a support group of families of alcoholics many years ago which I will never forget. One father said that no matter what he did for his son he could not save him from himself. The father had given him all of the tools, support and resources needed to survive and be rescued from his addiction. He said it was like watching a person who thought they were drowning in 10 feet of water screaming for air and a life saving device when in reality he just needed to put his feet down in one spot and see that he was only in 3 feet of water.
His slavery was all in his head and recognizing the rescue was essential in the deliverence. Are you recognizing your rescue and claiming your freedom?
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Scary Shadows
"Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for Thou art with me. Psalm 23:4
I have been reading the 23rd Psalm since I was a little girl and have just now "processed" a word in this verse that has monumental meaning. The word "shadow" brings a revelation this morning like no other! A shadow is a counterfeit image and a distorted reflection of a reality.
In any valley there are certain truths - truths that are immovable. For example, I am living as secondary caregiver for my father-in-law who suffers with Alzheimer's. That is a "valley truth" for which I live and move. My shadows bounce off of that truth creating shadows of fear, frustration, sometimes anger and doom. Like shadows, these untruths sometimes appear bigger than the reality from what they are reflecting.
Have you ever noticed that shadows are always taller and loom over us than what our bodies reflect? They are always distorted much like with our fears. In the 23rd Psalm I feel that God is saying though we will travel through these scary valleys, the death we sense are only shadows of our reality. There is no death in Christ so if we are allowing Him to guide our steps through the deep terrains we may see images of certain deaths, death of an earthly life, death of a marriage, death of a tightly held dream, but they are only shadows in the valley and hold no power over us except the power we assign them in our minds.
What shadows is your reality casting?
I have been reading the 23rd Psalm since I was a little girl and have just now "processed" a word in this verse that has monumental meaning. The word "shadow" brings a revelation this morning like no other! A shadow is a counterfeit image and a distorted reflection of a reality.
In any valley there are certain truths - truths that are immovable. For example, I am living as secondary caregiver for my father-in-law who suffers with Alzheimer's. That is a "valley truth" for which I live and move. My shadows bounce off of that truth creating shadows of fear, frustration, sometimes anger and doom. Like shadows, these untruths sometimes appear bigger than the reality from what they are reflecting.
Have you ever noticed that shadows are always taller and loom over us than what our bodies reflect? They are always distorted much like with our fears. In the 23rd Psalm I feel that God is saying though we will travel through these scary valleys, the death we sense are only shadows of our reality. There is no death in Christ so if we are allowing Him to guide our steps through the deep terrains we may see images of certain deaths, death of an earthly life, death of a marriage, death of a tightly held dream, but they are only shadows in the valley and hold no power over us except the power we assign them in our minds.
What shadows is your reality casting?
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Mixed Bag
"We love because he first loved us." 1 John 4:19
Love is defined by each of us based on our perception of love, our expectations of love and our limitations of love. It is a wonder any of us ever truly fall in love, live in love and die in love. In all relationships, whether romantic or platonic, we come to the table with our definition of what love looks like, feels like and should be like. Our "bag of love" is made up of past experiences, failures, wounds, but also joyful moments - it truly is a "mixed bag".
The true example of love has been given over and over in the Bible by the manner in which Christ carried Himself on earth and how God sacrificed His son. It was a love that had no expectations in return, a love for the other person, an unconditional love without limit. Not that we can ever live up to this perfect love on earth but we certainly have a truthful measuring stick. God knew love first and through His word, prayer and meditation He tries to show us how to love. He created love so only He knows what it really looks like.
Before our children loved us we first loved them. The more time we spent together their perception of love was formed by the way we loved them first. The same is with God. Virelle Kidder, Meet Me at the Well, writes: "The problem that dogs most of us is the expectation of returned love or at least gratitude. But God's love isn't contingent on our capacity to love Him back. Once turned loose, it is the only power on earth capable of changing another human life from the inside out. God calls it grace, totally unmerited love. Receiving grace can be revolutionary. Giving it is God-like."
To love like God we must love without expectations, love without conditions and love without fear.
Love is defined by each of us based on our perception of love, our expectations of love and our limitations of love. It is a wonder any of us ever truly fall in love, live in love and die in love. In all relationships, whether romantic or platonic, we come to the table with our definition of what love looks like, feels like and should be like. Our "bag of love" is made up of past experiences, failures, wounds, but also joyful moments - it truly is a "mixed bag".
The true example of love has been given over and over in the Bible by the manner in which Christ carried Himself on earth and how God sacrificed His son. It was a love that had no expectations in return, a love for the other person, an unconditional love without limit. Not that we can ever live up to this perfect love on earth but we certainly have a truthful measuring stick. God knew love first and through His word, prayer and meditation He tries to show us how to love. He created love so only He knows what it really looks like.
Before our children loved us we first loved them. The more time we spent together their perception of love was formed by the way we loved them first. The same is with God. Virelle Kidder, Meet Me at the Well, writes: "The problem that dogs most of us is the expectation of returned love or at least gratitude. But God's love isn't contingent on our capacity to love Him back. Once turned loose, it is the only power on earth capable of changing another human life from the inside out. God calls it grace, totally unmerited love. Receiving grace can be revolutionary. Giving it is God-like."
To love like God we must love without expectations, love without conditions and love without fear.
Monday, May 25, 2009
Care to Dance?
"Arise my darling, my beautiful one, and come with me." Song of Solomon 2:10.
There are many facets of God's love but the romantic face of God always makes me feel shy, embarrassed and just a little uncomfortable. This is God we are talking about, the Creator of the universe, the One who stores thunder and lightning in a storehouse and tells each one where to strike. He is the One who makes decisions about life being made and life being taken. So excuse me if I feel a little shaken by this romantic image of the two of us.
It is easy to call Him Father for I have such a wonderful relationship with my own. It is easy to call Him Savior because He has saved me from so much in my life. It is easy to call Him Redeemer for He has redeemed my life so I will be eternally with Him...but to call Him Darling seems almost disrespectful as if we are equals - one for which I am undeserving. In thinking about this, I had to reconcile this reference of relationship in my heart so that I could fulfil this aspect of our fellowship.
Jeff Walling, in his book Daring to Dance with God, helped me redefine this aspect of fellowship. He says that "each of us pines to relax into the arms of one stronger than we are, one who can then lead us in the 'dance' choreographed just for us". Is this not the desire of finding a romance in our world today? Is our search for a romantic relationship not partly a desire to find security, comfort and enjoyment in one we can count on, receive protection and lead in our dance of life? This is the reference for which I can call God, "Darling". I can take those nail scarred hands as He offers them to me, allow Him to pull me close to Him and listen for the music. As I hear the music He sends I will wait until He moves so that my movement will be in response to where He leads. When He moves to the right I will turn and when He stops to change the song I will not move ahead.
He will be my Lead and I will follow Him. We are all in a choreographed dance with God as Jeff Walling states and it is up to us to listen for the music and know when to move out in step as God leads. Thank you dear Love for leading me in this dance called life.
There are many facets of God's love but the romantic face of God always makes me feel shy, embarrassed and just a little uncomfortable. This is God we are talking about, the Creator of the universe, the One who stores thunder and lightning in a storehouse and tells each one where to strike. He is the One who makes decisions about life being made and life being taken. So excuse me if I feel a little shaken by this romantic image of the two of us.
It is easy to call Him Father for I have such a wonderful relationship with my own. It is easy to call Him Savior because He has saved me from so much in my life. It is easy to call Him Redeemer for He has redeemed my life so I will be eternally with Him...but to call Him Darling seems almost disrespectful as if we are equals - one for which I am undeserving. In thinking about this, I had to reconcile this reference of relationship in my heart so that I could fulfil this aspect of our fellowship.
Jeff Walling, in his book Daring to Dance with God, helped me redefine this aspect of fellowship. He says that "each of us pines to relax into the arms of one stronger than we are, one who can then lead us in the 'dance' choreographed just for us". Is this not the desire of finding a romance in our world today? Is our search for a romantic relationship not partly a desire to find security, comfort and enjoyment in one we can count on, receive protection and lead in our dance of life? This is the reference for which I can call God, "Darling". I can take those nail scarred hands as He offers them to me, allow Him to pull me close to Him and listen for the music. As I hear the music He sends I will wait until He moves so that my movement will be in response to where He leads. When He moves to the right I will turn and when He stops to change the song I will not move ahead.
He will be my Lead and I will follow Him. We are all in a choreographed dance with God as Jeff Walling states and it is up to us to listen for the music and know when to move out in step as God leads. Thank you dear Love for leading me in this dance called life.
Sunday, May 24, 2009
Walk This Way
"But if anyone obeys his word, God's love is truly made complete in him. This is how we know we are complete in him: Whoever claims to live in him must walk as Jesus did." 1 John 2:6.
The other day my grandson, Carson had spent the night with me and I was to meet his mom at church the next day. It was time to leave for church and I was "rounding" Carson up. I told him that we needed to get in the car so we could go to church. He looked at me with sad eyes and said, "Emmy, I want to be a good listener but I don't want to get in the car." Obeying His word...how many times, with sad eyes, do we look at God and state the same? By obeying His word we access the completion of God's love in us. Think of how we feel when our children obey our rules and choose our way instead of their's. We place those rules upon their lives in an effort to teach, to protect and to show them our love. Obedience serves as a conduit for the completion of love that flows between parent and child.
The same is with our Father. The more we emulate Him and obey what He is asking of us the more we will look like Christ did while on earth. People will not question who rules within us but will know by our actions. I tell my children as well as reminding myself, "Actions and words follow where the heart leads". I try to remind myself of this if I am feeling irritated, frustrated or facing a situation that could turn negative quickly.
I love what Virelle Kidder wrote in Meet Me At The Well. She wrote, "Shake a glass of milk and milk will spill out. If vinegar is in there, guess what will come out? If Jesus is Lord on the inside, whether we're shaken, stirred or broken in bits, His person will come out; His love will express itself; His expression will be on our faces. It can't be otherwise."
The other day my grandson, Carson had spent the night with me and I was to meet his mom at church the next day. It was time to leave for church and I was "rounding" Carson up. I told him that we needed to get in the car so we could go to church. He looked at me with sad eyes and said, "Emmy, I want to be a good listener but I don't want to get in the car." Obeying His word...how many times, with sad eyes, do we look at God and state the same? By obeying His word we access the completion of God's love in us. Think of how we feel when our children obey our rules and choose our way instead of their's. We place those rules upon their lives in an effort to teach, to protect and to show them our love. Obedience serves as a conduit for the completion of love that flows between parent and child.
The same is with our Father. The more we emulate Him and obey what He is asking of us the more we will look like Christ did while on earth. People will not question who rules within us but will know by our actions. I tell my children as well as reminding myself, "Actions and words follow where the heart leads". I try to remind myself of this if I am feeling irritated, frustrated or facing a situation that could turn negative quickly.
I love what Virelle Kidder wrote in Meet Me At The Well. She wrote, "Shake a glass of milk and milk will spill out. If vinegar is in there, guess what will come out? If Jesus is Lord on the inside, whether we're shaken, stirred or broken in bits, His person will come out; His love will express itself; His expression will be on our faces. It can't be otherwise."
Saturday, May 23, 2009
Shards of Glass
"...you will be called Repairer of Broken Walls, Restorer of Streets with Dwellings." Isaiah 58:12b
Last year during my sister's cancer journey, a friend had told me that they had received an email from Paul, her husband giving a rundown of the medical things that had transpired. Her path was littered along the way with bad news at every turn, medically speaking. When there were glimmers of hope they were quickly dashed although God carried us all through this experience. The email that my brother-in-law had written stated at the end, "How many times can I shatter before I break?"
Don't I know that question too well as my personal experience was 8 years of hope continually dashed by despair. But we continue to hope...and continue...and continue.
We all face experiences that shatter our world and steal our hope, our joy and our peace. We end up fragile, exhaustion and broken wondering if we will ever be the same. Thankfully...we will not! God will not only repair our broken walls but he will "restore our streets" that lead us to a new home, a new way of living and a new testimony of how God saves.
I feel within me broken walls since my sister's death...fragile streets which I walk upon so this verse was so dear to me this morning. I have never read this verse before so it came to me as fresh baked bread this morning. It reminded me of a quote from Ken Gire in "A New Kind of Normal" which I will close with.
"When suffering shatters the carefully kept vase that is our lives, God stoops to pick up the pieces. But he doesn't put them back together as a restoration project patterned after our former selves. Instead, he sifts through the rubble and selects some of the shards as raw material for another project - a mosaic that tells the story of redemption."
Last year during my sister's cancer journey, a friend had told me that they had received an email from Paul, her husband giving a rundown of the medical things that had transpired. Her path was littered along the way with bad news at every turn, medically speaking. When there were glimmers of hope they were quickly dashed although God carried us all through this experience. The email that my brother-in-law had written stated at the end, "How many times can I shatter before I break?"
Don't I know that question too well as my personal experience was 8 years of hope continually dashed by despair. But we continue to hope...and continue...and continue.
We all face experiences that shatter our world and steal our hope, our joy and our peace. We end up fragile, exhaustion and broken wondering if we will ever be the same. Thankfully...we will not! God will not only repair our broken walls but he will "restore our streets" that lead us to a new home, a new way of living and a new testimony of how God saves.
I feel within me broken walls since my sister's death...fragile streets which I walk upon so this verse was so dear to me this morning. I have never read this verse before so it came to me as fresh baked bread this morning. It reminded me of a quote from Ken Gire in "A New Kind of Normal" which I will close with.
"When suffering shatters the carefully kept vase that is our lives, God stoops to pick up the pieces. But he doesn't put them back together as a restoration project patterned after our former selves. Instead, he sifts through the rubble and selects some of the shards as raw material for another project - a mosaic that tells the story of redemption."
Friday, May 22, 2009
Valley of Baca (Weeping)
"Blessed (happy) are those whose strength is in you, who have set their hearts on pilgrimage. As they pass through the Valley of Baca, they make it a place of springs; the autumn rains also cover it with pools (blessings).
As the pilgrims traveled through the valley they would dig pools or tanks so that when the rain fell it would be contained thereby affording them drink and refreshment.
We too are to make wells during our pilgrimage to prepare for the waterless journeys and the arid deserts. We must prepare our hearts with the spiritual reservoirs to capture all of the mercy God will rain down upon us. If we have not prepared our hearts and dug a well to receive the refreshing waters from Heaven we will become parched in our hearts and search for that drink of the world.
When the Lord sends the rain He intends for there to be a catching place deep in our soul to receive His mercy and quench our thirst. Through prayer and promise are our wells not being filled daily whether traveling on smooth paths or rugged terrain? Our pools will overflow with the precious dew from Heaven when we dig the springs and let the Living Waters flow into and out of our lives. The pools will never run dry and the rain will sparkle those perfect drops of drenching refreshment. We only need to look to Heaven, open our mouths and catch the rain! It is a holy rain sent by the Holy Father who encourages, refreshes and brings our thirst to complete satisfaction.
While on our pilgrimage we will travel in and out of valleys, some plentiful and abundant and others barren and dry. We carry within us these springs to refresh, restore and renew through His indwelling so dig those springs so God can fill them. While in the Valley of Baca, fix your gaze upon God and He will show you the next spring to bring you rest - it will not be an oasis - it will be the real thing!
As the pilgrims traveled through the valley they would dig pools or tanks so that when the rain fell it would be contained thereby affording them drink and refreshment.
We too are to make wells during our pilgrimage to prepare for the waterless journeys and the arid deserts. We must prepare our hearts with the spiritual reservoirs to capture all of the mercy God will rain down upon us. If we have not prepared our hearts and dug a well to receive the refreshing waters from Heaven we will become parched in our hearts and search for that drink of the world.
When the Lord sends the rain He intends for there to be a catching place deep in our soul to receive His mercy and quench our thirst. Through prayer and promise are our wells not being filled daily whether traveling on smooth paths or rugged terrain? Our pools will overflow with the precious dew from Heaven when we dig the springs and let the Living Waters flow into and out of our lives. The pools will never run dry and the rain will sparkle those perfect drops of drenching refreshment. We only need to look to Heaven, open our mouths and catch the rain! It is a holy rain sent by the Holy Father who encourages, refreshes and brings our thirst to complete satisfaction.
While on our pilgrimage we will travel in and out of valleys, some plentiful and abundant and others barren and dry. We carry within us these springs to refresh, restore and renew through His indwelling so dig those springs so God can fill them. While in the Valley of Baca, fix your gaze upon God and He will show you the next spring to bring you rest - it will not be an oasis - it will be the real thing!
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Portraits of Love
"God gives priceless love gifts in the form of those who put up with us. Beyond getting us through a difficult time, their love offers us a more authentic ministry. It's impossible to pay back God, but very possible to pass on the treasures He's given. If someone has done that for you, you are rich indeed." Virelle Kidder, Meet Me At The Well, p. 168.
This author writes of all of us having "framed portraits of love" in our lives that God has given us through His love. She challenges everyone to identify their portraits and be reminded and thankful to God for directing those people our way. He loved us through their love.
I have such an unbelievable album of portraits over the past year. To name a few are:
Bruce, who built me back up every evening when I returned from Beth's with his love, compassion, encouragement and strength...
Everyone on Caringbridge with the constant prayers and entries
The nurses and doctors at Hospice as I felt loved watching them love Beth.
All of my friends who stood beside me and guaged what I needed for that day alone
For Becki & Benay as they supported me in the day to day, everyday...
For Beth, who used every ounce of strength near the end to pull her hand up to my cheek to comfort me
For Mother, who reached out to comfort one of her children when her heart had been shattered...
These are just a few of my love portraits that helped carry me through the past year and should always be honored. All of these have one thing in common - they look like the face of Christ.
What do your love portraits look like?
This author writes of all of us having "framed portraits of love" in our lives that God has given us through His love. She challenges everyone to identify their portraits and be reminded and thankful to God for directing those people our way. He loved us through their love.
I have such an unbelievable album of portraits over the past year. To name a few are:
Bruce, who built me back up every evening when I returned from Beth's with his love, compassion, encouragement and strength...
Everyone on Caringbridge with the constant prayers and entries
The nurses and doctors at Hospice as I felt loved watching them love Beth.
All of my friends who stood beside me and guaged what I needed for that day alone
For Becki & Benay as they supported me in the day to day, everyday...
For Beth, who used every ounce of strength near the end to pull her hand up to my cheek to comfort me
For Mother, who reached out to comfort one of her children when her heart had been shattered...
These are just a few of my love portraits that helped carry me through the past year and should always be honored. All of these have one thing in common - they look like the face of Christ.
What do your love portraits look like?
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Me and the Ephesians
"I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being...Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen. Ephesians 3:16,20-21
This was Paul's prayer for the church at Ephesus to encourage them to experience the full measure of God, His love, His power and His strength. He knew the exhaustion, fatigue, and challenges of the work of establishing a church. Paul knew that the work of spreading the image of Christ through actions would induce insecurity, fear and weariness. He is exhorting them to not only believe in the power and strength of God made possible to them through Christ but to access this power.
All of us will experience this weary level of commitment for God as He places us in situations to further His work. Logically, some situations will require more than we have to give but believing we can access His power in these situations in advance will bring realized promises as He does the work within us to accomplish His purpose.
I am going to be with my sister-in-law and her sisters today during their mother's brain surgery to remove a tumor. I tossed and turned most of the night and have awakened sleep deprived. This surgery will be tough as it has the makings of transporting me back to a time with my dear sister as she faced a hopeful tumor removal in her liver. The outcome was less than desirable but we accepted it as God's will and allowed our faith in His ultimate wisdom and will to guide us. I am confident that God will strengthen me with His power today and not allow me to frustrate His work in that waiting room.
His greatest work is at the intersection where our greatest need meets His greatest provision.
This was Paul's prayer for the church at Ephesus to encourage them to experience the full measure of God, His love, His power and His strength. He knew the exhaustion, fatigue, and challenges of the work of establishing a church. Paul knew that the work of spreading the image of Christ through actions would induce insecurity, fear and weariness. He is exhorting them to not only believe in the power and strength of God made possible to them through Christ but to access this power.
All of us will experience this weary level of commitment for God as He places us in situations to further His work. Logically, some situations will require more than we have to give but believing we can access His power in these situations in advance will bring realized promises as He does the work within us to accomplish His purpose.
I am going to be with my sister-in-law and her sisters today during their mother's brain surgery to remove a tumor. I tossed and turned most of the night and have awakened sleep deprived. This surgery will be tough as it has the makings of transporting me back to a time with my dear sister as she faced a hopeful tumor removal in her liver. The outcome was less than desirable but we accepted it as God's will and allowed our faith in His ultimate wisdom and will to guide us. I am confident that God will strengthen me with His power today and not allow me to frustrate His work in that waiting room.
His greatest work is at the intersection where our greatest need meets His greatest provision.
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
I Know Nothing...
"Saul got up from the ground, but when he opened his eyes he could see nothing. So they led him by the hand into Damascus. For three days he was blind, and did not eat or drink anything." Acts 9:8-9
Saul was an extremely trained teacher of the Old Testament. He had trained under Gamaliel, who was an honored teacher of the law. No one knew the law of God and it's teaching better than Saul. He could recite any Scripture at any time for any purpose. Saul's education on the faith was unmatched and along with this knowledge was a misguided view on who God was. He was so unchanging in his knowledge of God that he became unmoved in his distortion of what was happening.
God struck Saul down on the road to Damascus and blinded him for three days by placing scales over his eyes. God was going to teach Saul new things during this time but had to first take away his "vision of all things as he had known them before". Many times the perception and knowledge we have built regarding who God is in our lives is distorted and requires a total reworking of our vision. God left Saul in the dark for three days but still sent him guidance and help to assist in his blindness.
I had a perception of who God was when Kristen was battling drugs. I can only assume that since I constantly was looking to "fix" her, I was subconsciously short on trust that God could deliver her from her drug addiction. I didn't have him powerful enough, faithful enough and smart enough so on my road He had to remove my perceived vision of who I thought He was and create a situation where He could show me who He was - a God of deliverance, a God of purpose, a God of faithfulness and a God of sovereignty. He was so much more than my perception of Him.
Sometimes we get so complacent in thinking we know who God is we lose the vastness of His being and the enormity of His power. God reworked my vision, much like Saul's, and made me blind for a while but brought my vision back into focus once He had done the work in my life He knew my limited knowledge would have prevented.
In many trials, we are blinded to learn something different about God and to "unlearn" things that have become our "God truths" which are not consistent with who He really is. Just when we think we know Him the scales cover our eyes, we become totally dependent and wait for the vision to return.
Saul was an extremely trained teacher of the Old Testament. He had trained under Gamaliel, who was an honored teacher of the law. No one knew the law of God and it's teaching better than Saul. He could recite any Scripture at any time for any purpose. Saul's education on the faith was unmatched and along with this knowledge was a misguided view on who God was. He was so unchanging in his knowledge of God that he became unmoved in his distortion of what was happening.
God struck Saul down on the road to Damascus and blinded him for three days by placing scales over his eyes. God was going to teach Saul new things during this time but had to first take away his "vision of all things as he had known them before". Many times the perception and knowledge we have built regarding who God is in our lives is distorted and requires a total reworking of our vision. God left Saul in the dark for three days but still sent him guidance and help to assist in his blindness.
I had a perception of who God was when Kristen was battling drugs. I can only assume that since I constantly was looking to "fix" her, I was subconsciously short on trust that God could deliver her from her drug addiction. I didn't have him powerful enough, faithful enough and smart enough so on my road He had to remove my perceived vision of who I thought He was and create a situation where He could show me who He was - a God of deliverance, a God of purpose, a God of faithfulness and a God of sovereignty. He was so much more than my perception of Him.
Sometimes we get so complacent in thinking we know who God is we lose the vastness of His being and the enormity of His power. God reworked my vision, much like Saul's, and made me blind for a while but brought my vision back into focus once He had done the work in my life He knew my limited knowledge would have prevented.
In many trials, we are blinded to learn something different about God and to "unlearn" things that have become our "God truths" which are not consistent with who He really is. Just when we think we know Him the scales cover our eyes, we become totally dependent and wait for the vision to return.
Monday, May 18, 2009
Risk Takers
"The biggest payout, however, usually follows the biggest gamble. And the biggest gamble always represents the biggest potential sacrifice." Fiona Soltes, "Ruth, Gleaning Hope" p.30.
This statement rings such truth for me as I study the call of the disciples. They were living their lives based on the life they had built for themselves. Along comes this radical stranger and simply says "Follow Me and I will make you fishers of men". (Mark 1:16) What in the world did this mean to these guys? They didn't sit down with Jesus and ask what that would look like nor did they ask for more time to get things in order. He called them as they were in the midst of "doing their own thing, their own way and in their own time". Scripture states they simple laid down their nets, rose up and followed Him.
When I think of everything that went along with this obedience I am astonished at their willingness to walk away from the life they had built. No doubt their nets represented security and comfort, their way of life that they had always depended upon. Their net represented their will, their way and their life just as we carry around our nets.
They took the biggest gamble of all when called by Jesus, giving up everything known to them to receive a vague reward promised by a man whom they had just met. They sacrificed not only the earthly comforts but the emotional comforts of security, family ridicule and just good logic. I would say their sacrifice paid off in huge yields and returns based on their obedience.
What is God calling you to do that will require you to "lay down your nets and follow Him"? Do you have the disciple trust in the payout at the end even if you do not know what that looks like?
"Immediately, they left their nets and followed Him."
This statement rings such truth for me as I study the call of the disciples. They were living their lives based on the life they had built for themselves. Along comes this radical stranger and simply says "Follow Me and I will make you fishers of men". (Mark 1:16) What in the world did this mean to these guys? They didn't sit down with Jesus and ask what that would look like nor did they ask for more time to get things in order. He called them as they were in the midst of "doing their own thing, their own way and in their own time". Scripture states they simple laid down their nets, rose up and followed Him.
When I think of everything that went along with this obedience I am astonished at their willingness to walk away from the life they had built. No doubt their nets represented security and comfort, their way of life that they had always depended upon. Their net represented their will, their way and their life just as we carry around our nets.
They took the biggest gamble of all when called by Jesus, giving up everything known to them to receive a vague reward promised by a man whom they had just met. They sacrificed not only the earthly comforts but the emotional comforts of security, family ridicule and just good logic. I would say their sacrifice paid off in huge yields and returns based on their obedience.
What is God calling you to do that will require you to "lay down your nets and follow Him"? Do you have the disciple trust in the payout at the end even if you do not know what that looks like?
"Immediately, they left their nets and followed Him."
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Aged to Perfection
"If we are going to be made into wine, we will have to be crushed; you cannot drink grapes. Grapes become wine only when they have been squeezed." Oswald Chambers
Ruth and Naomi found themselves in a season of intense need. They are husbandless, alone and hungry. They find themselves in a strange set of circumstances that presents major challenges in their lives. Through their analysis of their sitation they decided that they were positioned where they could no longer benefit. They were in a severe area of need so they sought out a rescue plan to leave their city and go to Bethlehem where the "LORD was paying attention to the needs of the people in that land".
How many times have we been in this place not knowing where to turn, when to turn and how to turn? We see the LORD working in the lives of others and begin our journey to Bethlehem. We somehow feel that God has favored others over us but we still have that urge to move closer. By moving closer to the ones you see God working in their lives, we benefit from the white horse riding in to become their hero.
Until we are needy for something we cannot experience the joy of receiving. We will all come in and out of need throughout our journey in life as it is promised in Isaiah 43. "When you pass through the waters...And through the rivers...When you walk through the fire..." God presents three different dilemmas but one promise of rescue - Him.
We must be squeezed and crushed to position ourselves to become aged to perfection. Without the loss of lives of the men in our story, Ruth and Naomi would never have received the "bigger story" blessings God intended for them to receive. He has a "bigger story" for you and me but we have to be willing to travel.
Traveling out of need into provision will never be a journey that comes up empty.
Ruth and Naomi found themselves in a season of intense need. They are husbandless, alone and hungry. They find themselves in a strange set of circumstances that presents major challenges in their lives. Through their analysis of their sitation they decided that they were positioned where they could no longer benefit. They were in a severe area of need so they sought out a rescue plan to leave their city and go to Bethlehem where the "LORD was paying attention to the needs of the people in that land".
How many times have we been in this place not knowing where to turn, when to turn and how to turn? We see the LORD working in the lives of others and begin our journey to Bethlehem. We somehow feel that God has favored others over us but we still have that urge to move closer. By moving closer to the ones you see God working in their lives, we benefit from the white horse riding in to become their hero.
Until we are needy for something we cannot experience the joy of receiving. We will all come in and out of need throughout our journey in life as it is promised in Isaiah 43. "When you pass through the waters...And through the rivers...When you walk through the fire..." God presents three different dilemmas but one promise of rescue - Him.
We must be squeezed and crushed to position ourselves to become aged to perfection. Without the loss of lives of the men in our story, Ruth and Naomi would never have received the "bigger story" blessings God intended for them to receive. He has a "bigger story" for you and me but we have to be willing to travel.
Traveling out of need into provision will never be a journey that comes up empty.
Saturday, May 16, 2009
Rhythm and Renewal
"Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest." Mark 6:31.
Simple command with huge rewards but why is it that this is one of the hardest things to accomplish? Why can't we buy into this as Jesus did? Not one of us will ever have the schedule of Jesus and the burdens for which He carried for both others and Himself.
Many times in life Christ is speaking the same words to us that He spoke to His disciples in this verse. Many Christians talk about trust in God for deliverence from terrible seasons, trust in healing, trust in provision but many of us do not trust this simple command. We frustrate ourselves by cramming as much in our calendars as we possibly can in an effort to please both ourselves and others.
When I was trying to "fix" Kristen many years ago the one plan I didn't try was this simple command. I didn't make a spot on the calendar to rest in Him on a daily basis. I found myself bed-ridden for three months in excruciating back pain. I was tested for slipped disc, pinched nerves, and degenerative muscular disorder to name a few. With each test nothing showed up but extreme frustration on my part that without a diagnosis of anything there was no hope for a treatment plan. Over the next few days it became clear that my pain was associated with my stress, my fears and not to mention my lack of rest (physically, mentally and emotional). But it was the lack of rest spiritually that created the pain in my heart which was much greater than the pain in my back.
When I didn't make this command first and foremost God took matters into His own hands to allow me the rest required to get through this season. While bed-ridden I was obviously forced to rest and my back was eventually restored along with my spirit. I still had many years ahead of me in this season of darkness but I never forgot the fact that when I wouldn't go with Him to a quiet place, He, in His ultimate love and wisdom, picked me up and carried me to that quiet place with Him.
We can retreat to Him and enjoy the restoration in Him or He can clear our calendar for us in His own way such as He did when I had busied my spiritual calendar to the point of excluding time with Him. No matter what I have on my calendar, whether it is emotional, physical or mental there is a quiet place early in the morning where we meet together, discuss the day and prayerfully abide in each other.
Simple command with huge rewards but why is it that this is one of the hardest things to accomplish? Why can't we buy into this as Jesus did? Not one of us will ever have the schedule of Jesus and the burdens for which He carried for both others and Himself.
Many times in life Christ is speaking the same words to us that He spoke to His disciples in this verse. Many Christians talk about trust in God for deliverence from terrible seasons, trust in healing, trust in provision but many of us do not trust this simple command. We frustrate ourselves by cramming as much in our calendars as we possibly can in an effort to please both ourselves and others.
When I was trying to "fix" Kristen many years ago the one plan I didn't try was this simple command. I didn't make a spot on the calendar to rest in Him on a daily basis. I found myself bed-ridden for three months in excruciating back pain. I was tested for slipped disc, pinched nerves, and degenerative muscular disorder to name a few. With each test nothing showed up but extreme frustration on my part that without a diagnosis of anything there was no hope for a treatment plan. Over the next few days it became clear that my pain was associated with my stress, my fears and not to mention my lack of rest (physically, mentally and emotional). But it was the lack of rest spiritually that created the pain in my heart which was much greater than the pain in my back.
When I didn't make this command first and foremost God took matters into His own hands to allow me the rest required to get through this season. While bed-ridden I was obviously forced to rest and my back was eventually restored along with my spirit. I still had many years ahead of me in this season of darkness but I never forgot the fact that when I wouldn't go with Him to a quiet place, He, in His ultimate love and wisdom, picked me up and carried me to that quiet place with Him.
We can retreat to Him and enjoy the restoration in Him or He can clear our calendar for us in His own way such as He did when I had busied my spiritual calendar to the point of excluding time with Him. No matter what I have on my calendar, whether it is emotional, physical or mental there is a quiet place early in the morning where we meet together, discuss the day and prayerfully abide in each other.
Friday, May 15, 2009
Even If....
"...Even if I thought there was still hope for me...It is more bitter for me than for you, because the LORD's hand has gone out against me!" Ruth 1:12-13
These are the words Naomi spoke when her daughters-in-law made a commitment to stay with her upon the death of her sons. They genuinely felt that they wanted to remain with Naomi out of love and gratitude. These woman were Moabites and did not serve the God of Israel until coming into the family of Elimelech and Naomi. Naomi approached the conversation through an inward grief instead of a "community" grief. She had decided that she was in a hopeless situation and that the deaths were acts of punishment from the LORD. She wanted no part of the grief of her daughters-in-law so she could take up bitterness as her new companion.
With fresh grief in my life, I can relate to wanting to be near the ones who have gone through this with me. To seperate myself from my fellow grief bearers would be another form of loss that I could not bear. I feel a kinsmanship with Ruth as she is determined to remain with one who is so closely connected with her loss. Ruth is not only searching for her own comforts with her mother-in-law but desires a continued relationship with her out of love and gratitude for introducing her God to her.
As hard as it is for my family to bear my grief, not one member has pulled the Naomi card and is willing daily, if needed, to comfort me and lift me up although they are experiencing their own grief. A community of family is not only for the good times but the times when things seem hopeless, senseless and sad. Family experiences such as these can anchor our commitment to each other even more or discourage us from facing the painful faces who are traveling with us.
Naomi would have missed out on so much if Ruth hadn't remained with her and worked through the sadness and pain. Through Ruth's commitment to stay Naomi was able to turn her grief from being secluded and inward to having a responsibility for someone else in her "community of grief". It is easy to pull the covers over our head when living in grief but who is it helping? It is easy to push people away during our grief but what is it teaching? Grief comes in all forms - divorce, abandonment, loss of a job, death, etc...
I thank God everyday for the Ruth's in my family and pray that I, too, can be a Ruth for someone else.
These are the words Naomi spoke when her daughters-in-law made a commitment to stay with her upon the death of her sons. They genuinely felt that they wanted to remain with Naomi out of love and gratitude. These woman were Moabites and did not serve the God of Israel until coming into the family of Elimelech and Naomi. Naomi approached the conversation through an inward grief instead of a "community" grief. She had decided that she was in a hopeless situation and that the deaths were acts of punishment from the LORD. She wanted no part of the grief of her daughters-in-law so she could take up bitterness as her new companion.
With fresh grief in my life, I can relate to wanting to be near the ones who have gone through this with me. To seperate myself from my fellow grief bearers would be another form of loss that I could not bear. I feel a kinsmanship with Ruth as she is determined to remain with one who is so closely connected with her loss. Ruth is not only searching for her own comforts with her mother-in-law but desires a continued relationship with her out of love and gratitude for introducing her God to her.
As hard as it is for my family to bear my grief, not one member has pulled the Naomi card and is willing daily, if needed, to comfort me and lift me up although they are experiencing their own grief. A community of family is not only for the good times but the times when things seem hopeless, senseless and sad. Family experiences such as these can anchor our commitment to each other even more or discourage us from facing the painful faces who are traveling with us.
Naomi would have missed out on so much if Ruth hadn't remained with her and worked through the sadness and pain. Through Ruth's commitment to stay Naomi was able to turn her grief from being secluded and inward to having a responsibility for someone else in her "community of grief". It is easy to pull the covers over our head when living in grief but who is it helping? It is easy to push people away during our grief but what is it teaching? Grief comes in all forms - divorce, abandonment, loss of a job, death, etc...
I thank God everyday for the Ruth's in my family and pray that I, too, can be a Ruth for someone else.
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Gathering Among the Sheaves
"Boaz gave orders to his men. 'Even if she gathers among the sheaves, don't embarrass her. Rather, pull out some stalks for her from the bundles and leave them for her to pick up, and don't rebuke her.'" Ruth 2:15-16.
Anytime we are in a vulnerable season or a new endeavor it is easy to be short on faith and full on fear such as Ruth experienced as she started her life over in foreign circumstances. She caught the attention of someone who had mercy on her sitution who knew she would need additional care and concern.
Our Father is the same way as he manages our fields. He sends people ahead of us to make things easier so our insurmountable tasks are not laced with insurmountable hopelessness. He "loosens the soil and pulls up the stalks" to make our efforts more rewarding and successful. He doesn't remove the stalks for us but leaves them laying there so we may feel the success of harvesting with thankfulness. He puts compassion in the hearts of those around us to encourage and support during those heated days when our tasks are tough and the days are long.
On the flipside, when we are experiencing an abundant season in our own field it is our duty to "pull up stalks" for the ones who are experiencing a fragile time in their life. We are to "loosen and lighten" their load in an effort to encourage and strengthen the faith of those are coming behind us in their faith.
When Christ is managing the fields, all fields will produce abundance and all the workers will be rewarded for their part in working both sides of the field. They are equal in their efforts and rewarded by their yield.
Anytime we are in a vulnerable season or a new endeavor it is easy to be short on faith and full on fear such as Ruth experienced as she started her life over in foreign circumstances. She caught the attention of someone who had mercy on her sitution who knew she would need additional care and concern.
Our Father is the same way as he manages our fields. He sends people ahead of us to make things easier so our insurmountable tasks are not laced with insurmountable hopelessness. He "loosens the soil and pulls up the stalks" to make our efforts more rewarding and successful. He doesn't remove the stalks for us but leaves them laying there so we may feel the success of harvesting with thankfulness. He puts compassion in the hearts of those around us to encourage and support during those heated days when our tasks are tough and the days are long.
On the flipside, when we are experiencing an abundant season in our own field it is our duty to "pull up stalks" for the ones who are experiencing a fragile time in their life. We are to "loosen and lighten" their load in an effort to encourage and strengthen the faith of those are coming behind us in their faith.
When Christ is managing the fields, all fields will produce abundance and all the workers will be rewarded for their part in working both sides of the field. They are equal in their efforts and rewarded by their yield.
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Clash of Thunder
"At this, she bowed down with her face to the ground. She exclaimed, 'Why have I found such favor in your eyes that you notice me -- a foreigner?'...May you be richly rewarded by the LORD, the God of Israel, under whose wings you have come to take refuge.'"
This was an exchange between Ruth and Boaz as her gratitude became overwhelming, and as Boaz prayed for the receiving of God's favor during this season of her life due to her faithfulness to God. This was also an exchange between my daughter Kristen and her Father five years ago tomorrow.
On Mother's Day five years ago I received a phone call from Kristen while I was celebrating Mother's Day at my parent's home. She called to inform me that my Mother's Day gift was that she checked herself into a detox center and was going to try to get clean. The phone call did not warrant the emotions typically experienced because I had heard these promises for years only to be dashed by the next expanding need for her fix of heroin. The cycle had rolled on and on for years so I told her that I was happy for her and I would take her up to the treatment center at the end of the week. I hung up and continued on with my celebration with guarded hope. I did drop her off at the treatment center on May 14, 2004 with little belief that this would be the "Day of the Great Awakening".
I received a phone call at work the following week from her as she was reduced to tears, despair, and disbelief that she could accomplish this. This call was different than the rest - God laid on my heart that day to tell her to pray a prayer of confession. We both hung up and went to our places of solitude to lift prayers up at the same time. I prayed that the same Father who had claimed me as His daughter would cover her with the same paternal acknowledgment to let her know who she was to Him. She called me a little while later sobbing telling me the following conversation she had with God.
"God, I don't even know what to say to you. I have been here so many times before and everything has been said. I cannot do this...I don't know what to say..." At that point she heard God say the beautiful words of acknowledgement every child needs, "You are MY child". It was at that moment that she confessed, accepted her belief that He could do this for her and started down her path tucked under His wings of refuge much like Ruth. Because of her belief in God's faithfulness He has richly rewarded her for her faithfulness.
Kristen didn't know how to pray at this point in her life but knew to whom she had to pray. He knew the words that needed to breathe life back into this corpse and He said them with a resounding thunder. I praise God this morning, and all mornings, for this experience much like Ruth did - bowed down with my face to the ground. Never lose your humility for that which God has thunderously brought to pass!
This was an exchange between Ruth and Boaz as her gratitude became overwhelming, and as Boaz prayed for the receiving of God's favor during this season of her life due to her faithfulness to God. This was also an exchange between my daughter Kristen and her Father five years ago tomorrow.
On Mother's Day five years ago I received a phone call from Kristen while I was celebrating Mother's Day at my parent's home. She called to inform me that my Mother's Day gift was that she checked herself into a detox center and was going to try to get clean. The phone call did not warrant the emotions typically experienced because I had heard these promises for years only to be dashed by the next expanding need for her fix of heroin. The cycle had rolled on and on for years so I told her that I was happy for her and I would take her up to the treatment center at the end of the week. I hung up and continued on with my celebration with guarded hope. I did drop her off at the treatment center on May 14, 2004 with little belief that this would be the "Day of the Great Awakening".
I received a phone call at work the following week from her as she was reduced to tears, despair, and disbelief that she could accomplish this. This call was different than the rest - God laid on my heart that day to tell her to pray a prayer of confession. We both hung up and went to our places of solitude to lift prayers up at the same time. I prayed that the same Father who had claimed me as His daughter would cover her with the same paternal acknowledgment to let her know who she was to Him. She called me a little while later sobbing telling me the following conversation she had with God.
"God, I don't even know what to say to you. I have been here so many times before and everything has been said. I cannot do this...I don't know what to say..." At that point she heard God say the beautiful words of acknowledgement every child needs, "You are MY child". It was at that moment that she confessed, accepted her belief that He could do this for her and started down her path tucked under His wings of refuge much like Ruth. Because of her belief in God's faithfulness He has richly rewarded her for her faithfulness.
Kristen didn't know how to pray at this point in her life but knew to whom she had to pray. He knew the words that needed to breathe life back into this corpse and He said them with a resounding thunder. I praise God this morning, and all mornings, for this experience much like Ruth did - bowed down with my face to the ground. Never lose your humility for that which God has thunderously brought to pass!
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
God's Field of Grace
"So Boaz said to Ruth, 'My daughter, listen to me. Don't go and glean in another field and don't go away from here. Stay here with my servant girls. Watch the field where the men are harvesting, and follow along after the girls...And whenever you are thirsty, go and get a drink from the water jars the men have filled.'" Ruth 2:8.
When reading over the second chapter of Ruth, it struck me that through life's circumstances Ruth found herself searching in a new town, a new season in her life and a new way to obtain the necessities required to survive. She approached this new life with humility as she carved out her own little niche in the fields of Boaz, a close relative of her deceased husband.
The verses above were the words communicated to Ruth by the owner of the field in which she was gleaning for leftover grain. Through the grace of Boaz he invited her to stay in his field and surround herself with his servants, workers and men. He offered her drink and refreshment as long as she stayed in his field and around his people.
Ruth's story can be our story when we choose to work in God's field. God lays out the harvest for us to glean if we carefully live within the boundaries of His land. We have all we need within these invisible walls to surround ourselves with His people and His servants who can assist when we become thirsty, weary from gleaning and sun-scorched. He promises that His fields will always produce, always protect and always nourish. He lays the choice out there for us to accept or reject. Ruth could have chosen another field, another owner, another way but instead her humility brought her into this field wherein she immediately began reaping the benefits and blessings from the owner.
Approaching the field of God requires Ruth-like humility, Ruth-like gratitude and Ruth-like obedience in order to glean the grain required to fill up our baskets. Boaz had plenty of workers but pleaded for Ruth to not go somewhere else with the promise of plenty from his field. God does this same pleading with us as we stand on the boundary line of His field bargaining with the One who has everything to give us if we will just come and work His fields.
There will never be another field that offers such sweet grain, such refreshing water and such powerful protection from the elements. Come and dance in the field of grace!
When reading over the second chapter of Ruth, it struck me that through life's circumstances Ruth found herself searching in a new town, a new season in her life and a new way to obtain the necessities required to survive. She approached this new life with humility as she carved out her own little niche in the fields of Boaz, a close relative of her deceased husband.
The verses above were the words communicated to Ruth by the owner of the field in which she was gleaning for leftover grain. Through the grace of Boaz he invited her to stay in his field and surround herself with his servants, workers and men. He offered her drink and refreshment as long as she stayed in his field and around his people.
Ruth's story can be our story when we choose to work in God's field. God lays out the harvest for us to glean if we carefully live within the boundaries of His land. We have all we need within these invisible walls to surround ourselves with His people and His servants who can assist when we become thirsty, weary from gleaning and sun-scorched. He promises that His fields will always produce, always protect and always nourish. He lays the choice out there for us to accept or reject. Ruth could have chosen another field, another owner, another way but instead her humility brought her into this field wherein she immediately began reaping the benefits and blessings from the owner.
Approaching the field of God requires Ruth-like humility, Ruth-like gratitude and Ruth-like obedience in order to glean the grain required to fill up our baskets. Boaz had plenty of workers but pleaded for Ruth to not go somewhere else with the promise of plenty from his field. God does this same pleading with us as we stand on the boundary line of His field bargaining with the One who has everything to give us if we will just come and work His fields.
There will never be another field that offers such sweet grain, such refreshing water and such powerful protection from the elements. Come and dance in the field of grace!
Monday, May 11, 2009
The Rain and the Snow
"As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish...so is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it." Isaiah 55:10-11.
Life sends many seasons, some moist and refreshing while others are cold and damaging. Much like the different seasons, each season serves a purpose in the life of a Christian. It brings with it a time for laughter, a time for tears, a time for silence and a time for trust. We cannot experience these times without being effected and transformed from one place of faith to another. These seasons water, prune and grow us as God speaks life, lesson and purpose into each of our walks.
When the harsh winds of the snowstorm arrive it comes from God who sees what is required to make us bud and flourish. He gives us the promise of fullness, purpose and a God-ordained accomplishment. We will not experience these seasons without the protection of His wisdom and knowledge that covers us with hope, trust and belief in a future season which will bring the refreshing rains of grace from Christ who sends all things. He does have a higher wisdom of what is required in our lives to water the life of Christians bringing purpose to pain and nourishment to the thirsty seedlings called His children.
Nothing survives without the careful watering and tending to from the Gardener. His carefully gloved hands tenderly peel back the damaged places in our souls, exposing the parts that need the light and water to survive. It is up to us to allow Him to remove these parts and tend to the more delicate pieces of our hearts that need to breathe, to experience the rain and to prosper and flourish.
Life sends many seasons, some moist and refreshing while others are cold and damaging. Much like the different seasons, each season serves a purpose in the life of a Christian. It brings with it a time for laughter, a time for tears, a time for silence and a time for trust. We cannot experience these times without being effected and transformed from one place of faith to another. These seasons water, prune and grow us as God speaks life, lesson and purpose into each of our walks.
When the harsh winds of the snowstorm arrive it comes from God who sees what is required to make us bud and flourish. He gives us the promise of fullness, purpose and a God-ordained accomplishment. We will not experience these seasons without the protection of His wisdom and knowledge that covers us with hope, trust and belief in a future season which will bring the refreshing rains of grace from Christ who sends all things. He does have a higher wisdom of what is required in our lives to water the life of Christians bringing purpose to pain and nourishment to the thirsty seedlings called His children.
Nothing survives without the careful watering and tending to from the Gardener. His carefully gloved hands tenderly peel back the damaged places in our souls, exposing the parts that need the light and water to survive. It is up to us to allow Him to remove these parts and tend to the more delicate pieces of our hearts that need to breathe, to experience the rain and to prosper and flourish.
Sunday, May 10, 2009
As You Have Said
"'I am the Lord's servant', Mary answered. 'May it be to me as you have said.' Then the angel left her." Luke 1:38
Imagine this scene...you are minding your own business going about your day when a messenger comes to you and explains that you are going to be put in a situation that will warrant judgement, disgrace, and humiliation for you and your family "because God had found favor" with you! This situation will ultimately result in the pain of sacrifice of your son.
You have been chosen to carry the Son of God knowing his fate. Mary was totally surrendered to God and was knowledgable on the fate of the Son of God when He was to come to save mankind. The Old Testament stated the prophesy that the Son would come to die for the sins of the world so that everyone could have eternal life. The earthly rewards of being this mother would be limited to the very early years. Her greatest reward of being called the mother of Jesus would be on the other side of Heaven and yet she answers immediately, "May it be to me as you have said."
What an amazing woman of strength, character and faith that this mother displayed. She has a forward faith that transcends all understanding as she faithfully and obediently wrapped her arms around the idea of receiving this pregnancy knowing the fate for her child. What she agreed to face in order to carry Christ, we would never sign up to experience. Without her amazing surrender Mary would have missed out on being the most precious mother of all - the mother of the Messiah.
Many mothers today have experienced suffering through different situations regarding their children but God blesses those tender spirits called Mothers, whether you mother your own children or the children of others. It is the spirit and heart of a person that constitutes what a mother is - a caring, sacrificial and loving person who reaches out beyond themselves to better the life of someone else. Thank God for mothers and thank God for sending that angel thousands of years ago to bless the ultimate selfless mother of Christ.
May we open our hearts with true abandon and say to our Father, "May it be to me as you have said" showing God our total trust in Him no matter what He may bring.
Happy Mother's Day.
Imagine this scene...you are minding your own business going about your day when a messenger comes to you and explains that you are going to be put in a situation that will warrant judgement, disgrace, and humiliation for you and your family "because God had found favor" with you! This situation will ultimately result in the pain of sacrifice of your son.
You have been chosen to carry the Son of God knowing his fate. Mary was totally surrendered to God and was knowledgable on the fate of the Son of God when He was to come to save mankind. The Old Testament stated the prophesy that the Son would come to die for the sins of the world so that everyone could have eternal life. The earthly rewards of being this mother would be limited to the very early years. Her greatest reward of being called the mother of Jesus would be on the other side of Heaven and yet she answers immediately, "May it be to me as you have said."
What an amazing woman of strength, character and faith that this mother displayed. She has a forward faith that transcends all understanding as she faithfully and obediently wrapped her arms around the idea of receiving this pregnancy knowing the fate for her child. What she agreed to face in order to carry Christ, we would never sign up to experience. Without her amazing surrender Mary would have missed out on being the most precious mother of all - the mother of the Messiah.
Many mothers today have experienced suffering through different situations regarding their children but God blesses those tender spirits called Mothers, whether you mother your own children or the children of others. It is the spirit and heart of a person that constitutes what a mother is - a caring, sacrificial and loving person who reaches out beyond themselves to better the life of someone else. Thank God for mothers and thank God for sending that angel thousands of years ago to bless the ultimate selfless mother of Christ.
May we open our hearts with true abandon and say to our Father, "May it be to me as you have said" showing God our total trust in Him no matter what He may bring.
Happy Mother's Day.
Saturday, May 9, 2009
Land of the Free
"Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pastures." Psalm 37:3.
When I was a teenager I read The Pilgrim's Progress. I cannot remember if this book was required reading or whether I had chosen to read this book. Unfortunately, I cannot recite individual teachings of what this book taught me but I did retain the overall lesson of what this book supported. This was the spiritual walk of a Christian at every turn as he traveled to the ultimate land - Heaven. What I do remember is that he came "in and out" of different lands, some being rough terrain and other lands being beautiful and spacious.
I now understand that we are each living out our own "Pilgrim's Progress" as we journey in and out of lands, some known and some foreign. As I have stated before, three years ago my father-in-law was diagnosed with Alzheimers and suffers daily requiring a great deal of support from me and my husband. His wife is 82 and has her own health concerns so their lives have become enmeshed with ours. The above verse is a monumental command from God, one that we do not have to work hard at interpreting. If we trust whatever God brings to us, and respond faithfully and lovingly for the good of the other person, He will always bring us into our "good land". Love always works for the benefit of the other person - this is how Christ operated on earth and this is how we should be imitators. Lands of need will come in and out of our lives and we must trust God and "do good". Our response to the needs of others may be their safe pastures that God has promised them through their trust.
The second part of this verse is where this weary pilgrim has settled for now. Through prayer God has brought the need of a young woman who was seeking a job as a companion and satisfied our need for some assistance at this stage of his disease. It has brought me into a land of safe pasture, a land of freedom, a land of rest. This pilgrim will enjoy her time of reprieve and be thankful for the pastures for where she resides for now. I know that at the proper time he will have me throw my backpack on my back, slip on my hiking boots and journey to another land but I will trust my Guide. He knows where the next good pasture is hiding!
When I was a teenager I read The Pilgrim's Progress. I cannot remember if this book was required reading or whether I had chosen to read this book. Unfortunately, I cannot recite individual teachings of what this book taught me but I did retain the overall lesson of what this book supported. This was the spiritual walk of a Christian at every turn as he traveled to the ultimate land - Heaven. What I do remember is that he came "in and out" of different lands, some being rough terrain and other lands being beautiful and spacious.
I now understand that we are each living out our own "Pilgrim's Progress" as we journey in and out of lands, some known and some foreign. As I have stated before, three years ago my father-in-law was diagnosed with Alzheimers and suffers daily requiring a great deal of support from me and my husband. His wife is 82 and has her own health concerns so their lives have become enmeshed with ours. The above verse is a monumental command from God, one that we do not have to work hard at interpreting. If we trust whatever God brings to us, and respond faithfully and lovingly for the good of the other person, He will always bring us into our "good land". Love always works for the benefit of the other person - this is how Christ operated on earth and this is how we should be imitators. Lands of need will come in and out of our lives and we must trust God and "do good". Our response to the needs of others may be their safe pastures that God has promised them through their trust.
The second part of this verse is where this weary pilgrim has settled for now. Through prayer God has brought the need of a young woman who was seeking a job as a companion and satisfied our need for some assistance at this stage of his disease. It has brought me into a land of safe pasture, a land of freedom, a land of rest. This pilgrim will enjoy her time of reprieve and be thankful for the pastures for where she resides for now. I know that at the proper time he will have me throw my backpack on my back, slip on my hiking boots and journey to another land but I will trust my Guide. He knows where the next good pasture is hiding!
Friday, May 8, 2009
The Mud and Mire...
"I waited patiently for the LORD; he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God." Psalm 40: 1-3a.
The cry was to deliver my sweet sister from her prison... the mud and mire was the depair I felt while sitting next to her watching her with little life...the firm place to stand was the promise from God of her impending miracle.
Welcome to my song, my hymn of praise to our God! Back in the beginning of March, my son-in-law, who had relapsed previously, was to be rejoined with his wife and children the second week of March. He had been putting his life back together in a treatment program away from Charlotte. Kristen had been in her "mud and mire" for over 2 months and was needing the comfort of her husband as she watched her aunt lie dying. She had stated to me that she did not want to have to handle Beth's death without the support of her husband at home.
At the same time I would go and sit with my sister during the days in the week astonished each day that she could decline even more. I found myself questioning God's timing and wondering for what purpose this could be serving. Why must she lay here day after day unaware of her surroundings, fighting to keep her eyes focused on her surroundings and being held captive by her own body. Unlike the psalmist, David, I found myself impatient and asking God for justification. Then, one day, I understood God to be saying to me to recite my belief in His timing so I would sit there holding Beth's hand. As tears continuously ran down my cheeks, I would state aloud, "Your timing is perfect, your timing is perfect, your timing is perfect, etc..." Obviously, reciting these words were more intellectual at first but gradually He did lift me out of the quicksand of my mind. I finally felt there was purpose in the wait. He is God - He didn't owe me an explanation nor was He seeking my approval of the wait.
That was the Monday leading up to Beth's homegoing the following Sunday. My son-in-law came home that Tuesday and was reunited with the family. The weekend was to be one for Beth and Paul (her husband) alone as it was their 14th wedding anniversary. On the Friday before she passed my dad was drenched in God's grace and was able to face the inevitable with courage, faith and peace.
I am sure there are many other purposes for Beth's lingering but it is not up to us to question God nor His ways. I am now in another "waiting period" as a family member has chosen a lifestyle not consistent with the Word. I will continue to serve and sing a song of hope during this wait apart from the length of time. No matter what your "mud and mire" consists of God's timing will always be perfect. Sing a new song and He will lift you up and place your feet on the firm rock of the Bible.
The cry was to deliver my sweet sister from her prison... the mud and mire was the depair I felt while sitting next to her watching her with little life...the firm place to stand was the promise from God of her impending miracle.
Welcome to my song, my hymn of praise to our God! Back in the beginning of March, my son-in-law, who had relapsed previously, was to be rejoined with his wife and children the second week of March. He had been putting his life back together in a treatment program away from Charlotte. Kristen had been in her "mud and mire" for over 2 months and was needing the comfort of her husband as she watched her aunt lie dying. She had stated to me that she did not want to have to handle Beth's death without the support of her husband at home.
At the same time I would go and sit with my sister during the days in the week astonished each day that she could decline even more. I found myself questioning God's timing and wondering for what purpose this could be serving. Why must she lay here day after day unaware of her surroundings, fighting to keep her eyes focused on her surroundings and being held captive by her own body. Unlike the psalmist, David, I found myself impatient and asking God for justification. Then, one day, I understood God to be saying to me to recite my belief in His timing so I would sit there holding Beth's hand. As tears continuously ran down my cheeks, I would state aloud, "Your timing is perfect, your timing is perfect, your timing is perfect, etc..." Obviously, reciting these words were more intellectual at first but gradually He did lift me out of the quicksand of my mind. I finally felt there was purpose in the wait. He is God - He didn't owe me an explanation nor was He seeking my approval of the wait.
That was the Monday leading up to Beth's homegoing the following Sunday. My son-in-law came home that Tuesday and was reunited with the family. The weekend was to be one for Beth and Paul (her husband) alone as it was their 14th wedding anniversary. On the Friday before she passed my dad was drenched in God's grace and was able to face the inevitable with courage, faith and peace.
I am sure there are many other purposes for Beth's lingering but it is not up to us to question God nor His ways. I am now in another "waiting period" as a family member has chosen a lifestyle not consistent with the Word. I will continue to serve and sing a song of hope during this wait apart from the length of time. No matter what your "mud and mire" consists of God's timing will always be perfect. Sing a new song and He will lift you up and place your feet on the firm rock of the Bible.
Thursday, May 7, 2009
Touching the Hem
"But Jesus said, 'Someone has touched me; I know that power has gone out from me.' Then the woman, seeing that she could not go unnoticed, came trembling and fell at his feet. In the presence of all the people, she told why she had touched him and how she had been instantly healed. Then he said to her, 'Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace.'" Luke 8: 46 - 48
Here is the picture - a huge crowd had developed as Jesus and the disciples were making their way to the home of a dignitary, a ruler of the synagogue. As Jesus was trying to make His way through the crowd, a woman who had been bleeding for twelve years secretly slipped up behind Jesus and placed her slender little hand on the hem of His cloak. This stopped Jesus in His tracks as He stated that someone had touched Him and wanted to know the source of the person whom had accessed His healing power.
Jesus never wants to be anonymous to His children and wants to acknowledge the courage, bravery and faith of each act towards Him. In her mind, it was never a question of would she be healed but a question of could she find Him and access His power? There lies the rub... do we work our way through our crowded lives to find Him? It is easy to believe He can heal when we are Christians but do we do the work to align ourselves with His hem? Are we close enough to reach our hand out and touch the edge of Him? Do we come before Him in awe and trembling much like this woman realizing the greatness of His power and the possibilities of new life when we touch the Hem? Do we acknowledge our healing power comes from Him as our testimony? This woman was brave enough to come forward and reveal that she was the one who had accessed His power therein testifying to the amazing healing power of Him. Talk about an impact moment! Jesus had many of these - He had just met this woman and yet He refers to her immediately as daughter. She had taken the risk of touching Him and it had paid off through her faith.
When our circumstances have us lying there, bleeding, fearful, and wanting to find healing are we close enough to reach out for the "Him" or are we standing off in the crowd wondering why we are missing out? Do we inch, press and push our way to the edge of the power source knowing we will be able to access His power? Remember, healing is found at the intersection of where our greatest weakness meets His greatest strength. Reach out and touch His hem!
Here is the picture - a huge crowd had developed as Jesus and the disciples were making their way to the home of a dignitary, a ruler of the synagogue. As Jesus was trying to make His way through the crowd, a woman who had been bleeding for twelve years secretly slipped up behind Jesus and placed her slender little hand on the hem of His cloak. This stopped Jesus in His tracks as He stated that someone had touched Him and wanted to know the source of the person whom had accessed His healing power.
Jesus never wants to be anonymous to His children and wants to acknowledge the courage, bravery and faith of each act towards Him. In her mind, it was never a question of would she be healed but a question of could she find Him and access His power? There lies the rub... do we work our way through our crowded lives to find Him? It is easy to believe He can heal when we are Christians but do we do the work to align ourselves with His hem? Are we close enough to reach our hand out and touch the edge of Him? Do we come before Him in awe and trembling much like this woman realizing the greatness of His power and the possibilities of new life when we touch the Hem? Do we acknowledge our healing power comes from Him as our testimony? This woman was brave enough to come forward and reveal that she was the one who had accessed His power therein testifying to the amazing healing power of Him. Talk about an impact moment! Jesus had many of these - He had just met this woman and yet He refers to her immediately as daughter. She had taken the risk of touching Him and it had paid off through her faith.
When our circumstances have us lying there, bleeding, fearful, and wanting to find healing are we close enough to reach out for the "Him" or are we standing off in the crowd wondering why we are missing out? Do we inch, press and push our way to the edge of the power source knowing we will be able to access His power? Remember, healing is found at the intersection of where our greatest weakness meets His greatest strength. Reach out and touch His hem!
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
Waiting on Sunday....
"About midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the other prisoners were listening to them." Acts 16:25.
Sometimes our week gets so hectic as we run from one commitment to another. We remember the peace, serenity and powerful experience we just encountered a few days before at church. Where had that worship experience gone and why can't it be carried around in our hearts during the week? Nothing has changed, we love Christ and He loves us. In pondering this, I was drawn to an analogy of a romantic interlude between two people. In a desire to show love, respect and honor for someone we carry in our hearts we set aside time and prepare for time together. We shop for their favorite foods, set a beautiful candlelit table, and select the appropriate music for the purpose of creating an atmosphere deserving of that person and relationship.
If we would prepare one-tenth when approaching Christ, the outcome would be like Sunday worship everytime. I am not naive enough to think we have time to do this figuratively speaking but I am speaking more of preparing this atmosphere in our minds and hearts. I am speaking more of closing our eyes and picturing the face of Christ. I am speaking of visualizing lighting a candle and reaching across the table to connect with the scarred hands of the One who is in love with us. I am speaking of choosing a song that speaks of your love for Him and creating worship wherever you are like Paul and Silas did. They were in prison facing their death when they decided to "hold worship".
Even if you add one thing to your normal routine it puts your heart in a place where you are more conscious of entering into a special place. For me, I have started going to youtube.com once I complete my Bible Study but before I enter into prayer. I put in a video song request so I can watch the video along with hearing the sweet music. I am amazed each time how the spirit of humility seeps in my heart, spirit and mind and provides for me a "Sunday worship experience" everytime.
Visually, light a candle in your mind, spread a blanket in front of a fire, or pull up a stool to sit at His feet. Transform your time with Him from ordinary to the extraordinary. Afterall, He is an extraordinary God and deserves extraordinary worship!
Sometimes our week gets so hectic as we run from one commitment to another. We remember the peace, serenity and powerful experience we just encountered a few days before at church. Where had that worship experience gone and why can't it be carried around in our hearts during the week? Nothing has changed, we love Christ and He loves us. In pondering this, I was drawn to an analogy of a romantic interlude between two people. In a desire to show love, respect and honor for someone we carry in our hearts we set aside time and prepare for time together. We shop for their favorite foods, set a beautiful candlelit table, and select the appropriate music for the purpose of creating an atmosphere deserving of that person and relationship.
If we would prepare one-tenth when approaching Christ, the outcome would be like Sunday worship everytime. I am not naive enough to think we have time to do this figuratively speaking but I am speaking more of preparing this atmosphere in our minds and hearts. I am speaking more of closing our eyes and picturing the face of Christ. I am speaking of visualizing lighting a candle and reaching across the table to connect with the scarred hands of the One who is in love with us. I am speaking of choosing a song that speaks of your love for Him and creating worship wherever you are like Paul and Silas did. They were in prison facing their death when they decided to "hold worship".
Even if you add one thing to your normal routine it puts your heart in a place where you are more conscious of entering into a special place. For me, I have started going to youtube.com once I complete my Bible Study but before I enter into prayer. I put in a video song request so I can watch the video along with hearing the sweet music. I am amazed each time how the spirit of humility seeps in my heart, spirit and mind and provides for me a "Sunday worship experience" everytime.
Visually, light a candle in your mind, spread a blanket in front of a fire, or pull up a stool to sit at His feet. Transform your time with Him from ordinary to the extraordinary. Afterall, He is an extraordinary God and deserves extraordinary worship!
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
If I Die, I Die
"When this is done, I will go to the king, even though it is against the law. And if I perish, I perish" Esther 4:16b
This is sold out trust and belief in God! These were the words Esther stated when she realized God was calling her to be the instrument to deliver the Jews from annihilation in the Book of Esther. She looked at the worst case scenerio and stated resolve with that outcome because it was the will of God. When we realize a task God is requesting of us I am sure we can rattle off a number of excuses as to why we are unworthy to complete the task.
Fear is a powerful deterrent whether the fear is of public speaking, abandonment, a death or a fear of trusting God. "Our fears are often counterfeit guilt trips the devil uses to keep us from fully trusting God. If you are afraid God's will is the worst thing you could imagine, follow that thought to its source. It isn't from God. His plan for you is good, as He states in Jeremiah 29:11: 'For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.' (Virelle Kidder, Meet Me At The Well, p.69.) Esther didn't base her decision of trust on what outcome was most likely but on the One whom she could trust with her life.
Our fear of tomorrow and futile attempts of determining the future highlights our lack of faith in a God who brings all of our days under His authority. If we believe that God will provide in every trial no matter how long the crucible or what He is calling us for then we access the peace and comfort afforded to us all who wait on Him. We will not hand over the keys to chaos but know that Christ is our key to peace.
We can all insert something to match Esther's last sentence. Having stared into the face of losing the life of one of my children, I will never forget that constant and true threat of suffering that loss. Drug addiction and homelessness makes you face daily this inevitability. I experienced the threat up to the point of the confirmed phone call (which by the grace of God I never received). For me, that last line would read "So, if Kristen loses her sobriety, she loses her sobriety which could lead to her death." I am basically telling God that if I have to look into the worst situation, I am resolved with that because I am resolved in Him.
Hopefully, we will never have to face our worst fears but if we do, God will be there to catch us, heal us and prosper us.
This is sold out trust and belief in God! These were the words Esther stated when she realized God was calling her to be the instrument to deliver the Jews from annihilation in the Book of Esther. She looked at the worst case scenerio and stated resolve with that outcome because it was the will of God. When we realize a task God is requesting of us I am sure we can rattle off a number of excuses as to why we are unworthy to complete the task.
Fear is a powerful deterrent whether the fear is of public speaking, abandonment, a death or a fear of trusting God. "Our fears are often counterfeit guilt trips the devil uses to keep us from fully trusting God. If you are afraid God's will is the worst thing you could imagine, follow that thought to its source. It isn't from God. His plan for you is good, as He states in Jeremiah 29:11: 'For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.' (Virelle Kidder, Meet Me At The Well, p.69.) Esther didn't base her decision of trust on what outcome was most likely but on the One whom she could trust with her life.
Our fear of tomorrow and futile attempts of determining the future highlights our lack of faith in a God who brings all of our days under His authority. If we believe that God will provide in every trial no matter how long the crucible or what He is calling us for then we access the peace and comfort afforded to us all who wait on Him. We will not hand over the keys to chaos but know that Christ is our key to peace.
We can all insert something to match Esther's last sentence. Having stared into the face of losing the life of one of my children, I will never forget that constant and true threat of suffering that loss. Drug addiction and homelessness makes you face daily this inevitability. I experienced the threat up to the point of the confirmed phone call (which by the grace of God I never received). For me, that last line would read "So, if Kristen loses her sobriety, she loses her sobriety which could lead to her death." I am basically telling God that if I have to look into the worst situation, I am resolved with that because I am resolved in Him.
Hopefully, we will never have to face our worst fears but if we do, God will be there to catch us, heal us and prosper us.
Monday, May 4, 2009
Take No Offense
"Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you." Matthew 5:12.
During the earthly walk of Jesus, he served every minute of everyday. The needs of others as directed by His Father guided His walk. He walked in earthly shoes with earthly emotions such as fatigue, irritation, frustration, etc... He is no stranger to the feelings we endure daily. There was even a healing event in the Bible of the ten lepers who yelled at a distance for Jesus to heal them which He did. Upon their healing one of the lepers came running up to Jesus to thank him while the other nine went off dancing. Jesus stated "Were not all ten cleansed? Where are the other nine? Was no one found to return and give praise to God?" He had "righteous indignation" for He was upset because His Father wasn't getting the glory deserved. He took no offense personally because He was out to the do the will of His Father - not His own.
Over the past couple years I have been called upon to serve and serve and serve within the family. One day my baby sister informed me that maybe that was my ministry. I felt exasperated that my gift would be something that was so thankless and exhausting. In hindsight I see that my motivation in serving was not based upon feeling the privilege of God partnering with me in each of the lives of my family but in trying to meet an "earth need" of approval and satifaction within myself apart from bringing God glory. We do not choose our gifts but He chooses them for us. So, when I am "offended" by others to whom I am called to serve if they are thankless, I am reminded of Jesus who was only offended for His Father.
I feel God has transformed my heart to see service on earth as a privilege from Him and my blessings and rewards are not based upon their actions but based upon the promises of God. Do I get tired and weary? Absolutely! Do I want run and hide? You bet. My biggest lesson in this is to love and serve without expecting anything in return such as did Jesus.
During the earthly walk of Jesus, he served every minute of everyday. The needs of others as directed by His Father guided His walk. He walked in earthly shoes with earthly emotions such as fatigue, irritation, frustration, etc... He is no stranger to the feelings we endure daily. There was even a healing event in the Bible of the ten lepers who yelled at a distance for Jesus to heal them which He did. Upon their healing one of the lepers came running up to Jesus to thank him while the other nine went off dancing. Jesus stated "Were not all ten cleansed? Where are the other nine? Was no one found to return and give praise to God?" He had "righteous indignation" for He was upset because His Father wasn't getting the glory deserved. He took no offense personally because He was out to the do the will of His Father - not His own.
Over the past couple years I have been called upon to serve and serve and serve within the family. One day my baby sister informed me that maybe that was my ministry. I felt exasperated that my gift would be something that was so thankless and exhausting. In hindsight I see that my motivation in serving was not based upon feeling the privilege of God partnering with me in each of the lives of my family but in trying to meet an "earth need" of approval and satifaction within myself apart from bringing God glory. We do not choose our gifts but He chooses them for us. So, when I am "offended" by others to whom I am called to serve if they are thankless, I am reminded of Jesus who was only offended for His Father.
I feel God has transformed my heart to see service on earth as a privilege from Him and my blessings and rewards are not based upon their actions but based upon the promises of God. Do I get tired and weary? Absolutely! Do I want run and hide? You bet. My biggest lesson in this is to love and serve without expecting anything in return such as did Jesus.
Sunday, May 3, 2009
Cheap Imitations?
"Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God." Ephesians 5:1-2
The more we respect and love someone the more we aspire to become like them. My maternal grandmother was a complete card with her wicked humor and her loving character. Her boistrous laugh and sweet smelling perfume always lingered beyond my visit with her. I would remember funny things she said or did while we were there and the perfume on my clothes once we left her was a warm and loving reminder of the hugs she freely gave. Holdie indeed left her fragrant offering of love on each of her many grandchildren. Now departed, through past time spent with her I still enjoy her presence of spirit. Although, I do not feel Holdie’s presence physically I feel her presence spiritually and intellectually through my memories. When we do not feel God’s presence we still take our place in line knowing we are dearly loved children. Christ felt a separation from God as He hung on the cross. This loneliness and feeling of forsakenness was the prelude to the grand resurrection. Many times feelings of disconnect with God mark a time in a Christian’s life when God is working a powerful resurrection-to-be. As Christ hung on the cross his anguish was not the physical pain he was experiencing but the spiritual separateness and feelings of abandonment from His Father that He had to experience first. We are to be imitators of Christ in every way. While hanging on our crosses we may experience this same feeling of abandonment. Christ trusted and believed that even when He felt God had forsaken Him that He knew this separation must have been necessary in the grand scheme of things.
The fragrance of Christ also lingers on us and around us the more we are in His presence. We are bathed in His fragrant offerings of love, hope, joy, compassion, etc... and because of His relationship with our Father God accepts the pleasing sacrifice lifted by Christ on our behalf.
We all give off a fragrance based on who we are wrapping ourselves around. Certainly different times in my life I have given off more of an odor than a pleasing aroma based on the way in which I treated people. The only way to share the fragrance of Christ is to wrap your arms around Him and never let go!
The more we respect and love someone the more we aspire to become like them. My maternal grandmother was a complete card with her wicked humor and her loving character. Her boistrous laugh and sweet smelling perfume always lingered beyond my visit with her. I would remember funny things she said or did while we were there and the perfume on my clothes once we left her was a warm and loving reminder of the hugs she freely gave. Holdie indeed left her fragrant offering of love on each of her many grandchildren. Now departed, through past time spent with her I still enjoy her presence of spirit. Although, I do not feel Holdie’s presence physically I feel her presence spiritually and intellectually through my memories. When we do not feel God’s presence we still take our place in line knowing we are dearly loved children. Christ felt a separation from God as He hung on the cross. This loneliness and feeling of forsakenness was the prelude to the grand resurrection. Many times feelings of disconnect with God mark a time in a Christian’s life when God is working a powerful resurrection-to-be. As Christ hung on the cross his anguish was not the physical pain he was experiencing but the spiritual separateness and feelings of abandonment from His Father that He had to experience first. We are to be imitators of Christ in every way. While hanging on our crosses we may experience this same feeling of abandonment. Christ trusted and believed that even when He felt God had forsaken Him that He knew this separation must have been necessary in the grand scheme of things.
The fragrance of Christ also lingers on us and around us the more we are in His presence. We are bathed in His fragrant offerings of love, hope, joy, compassion, etc... and because of His relationship with our Father God accepts the pleasing sacrifice lifted by Christ on our behalf.
We all give off a fragrance based on who we are wrapping ourselves around. Certainly different times in my life I have given off more of an odor than a pleasing aroma based on the way in which I treated people. The only way to share the fragrance of Christ is to wrap your arms around Him and never let go!
Saturday, May 2, 2009
Who Am I?
"Who am I, O Sovereign LORD, and what is my family, that you have brought me this far? And as if this were not enough in your sight, O Sovereign LORD, you have also spoken about the future of the house of your servant. Is this your usual way of dealing with man, O Sovereign LORD?" 2 Samuel 7:18-19.
As we approach my daughter's 5-year sobriety birthday of May 14 I am on my knees before the LORD humbly and tearfully claiming these verses. When I think about the way the LORD brought Kristen through heroin addiction, homelessness, and many other paths of darkness I cannot believe that He worked that kind of miracle for my family. I can still remember a day when I was sitting at a stop light and glanced over at an old broken down store when my eyes were drawn to this slumped over girl who had passed out under a payphone - waiting for a call to get her next fix, no doubt. Upon closer look, I noticed it was Kristen. When the light turned, I slowly inched the car up to a parking lot, pulled over and sobbed, prayed and pleaded to God. I couldn't think of a time when I would ever see her healthy, clean and whole. It was a dark time with no answers and events like this were common for my family. But God sat her down and turned her around for His glory and gave her a beautiful story to tell of redemption and the ultimate love story - one between Father and child.
How can I ever approach God in prayer without the intense and heart consumed gratitude every time - and yet I do...I bring my commonplace mind and heart to Him with a less than spectacular display of amazement at the One whom I lay before. He has given me the greatest miracle ever - the saving of my child's life. What kind of encore can follow that...and yet there will be many encore performances for that is what my God does.
I am reading a book on the different ways we hear God in our lives and upon thinking about Who we are approaching, I mean really thinking, I wondered how we ever lose our sense of astonishment of Who this awesome God is for each of us. Everyone has had moments of such humility before God and amazement of the way He worked things in our behalf. By reminiscing these moments, and lingering in these workings He will lay upon our hearts the emotions, gratitude and remembrance of another time of pain from which He has delivered us. Bask in the warmth and remembrance of how God was mighty to save.
I have no reason to travel down that road where I saw Kristen many years ago but sometimes I take that detour just to go by that payphone and celebrate that my little girl no longer has that seat.
As we approach my daughter's 5-year sobriety birthday of May 14 I am on my knees before the LORD humbly and tearfully claiming these verses. When I think about the way the LORD brought Kristen through heroin addiction, homelessness, and many other paths of darkness I cannot believe that He worked that kind of miracle for my family. I can still remember a day when I was sitting at a stop light and glanced over at an old broken down store when my eyes were drawn to this slumped over girl who had passed out under a payphone - waiting for a call to get her next fix, no doubt. Upon closer look, I noticed it was Kristen. When the light turned, I slowly inched the car up to a parking lot, pulled over and sobbed, prayed and pleaded to God. I couldn't think of a time when I would ever see her healthy, clean and whole. It was a dark time with no answers and events like this were common for my family. But God sat her down and turned her around for His glory and gave her a beautiful story to tell of redemption and the ultimate love story - one between Father and child.
How can I ever approach God in prayer without the intense and heart consumed gratitude every time - and yet I do...I bring my commonplace mind and heart to Him with a less than spectacular display of amazement at the One whom I lay before. He has given me the greatest miracle ever - the saving of my child's life. What kind of encore can follow that...and yet there will be many encore performances for that is what my God does.
I am reading a book on the different ways we hear God in our lives and upon thinking about Who we are approaching, I mean really thinking, I wondered how we ever lose our sense of astonishment of Who this awesome God is for each of us. Everyone has had moments of such humility before God and amazement of the way He worked things in our behalf. By reminiscing these moments, and lingering in these workings He will lay upon our hearts the emotions, gratitude and remembrance of another time of pain from which He has delivered us. Bask in the warmth and remembrance of how God was mighty to save.
I have no reason to travel down that road where I saw Kristen many years ago but sometimes I take that detour just to go by that payphone and celebrate that my little girl no longer has that seat.
Friday, May 1, 2009
A Psalm 139 Life
"Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go to the heavens, you are there; if I make by bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast." Psalm 139.
My son is going into his senior year of college. Over the past year we have had many talks about growing up, relationships, choices and decisions about the future. He shared with me that although I haven't been around physically during his college career there are not many topics that arise that he is unsure as to what my opinion is on the subject. He also knows that any advice I offer him is based on the knowledge I have of who he is and what is best for him. I have known him since his birth and have watched him develop and grow into this person.
Psalm 139 is a similar conversation between David and God. You will be blessed if you truly take this chapter in and absorb the magnitude of who God is in our lives. If we lived out the belief of Psalm 139 we would never fret over anything in our lives. We would take the random and chaos in our lives and know that it was from God who works out every activity under the sun and uses it for our good. We would know that whether we are worshipping or sinning we cannot escape the presence of God. We may not be able to feel His presence but that doesn't change the fact that He is there. We cannot feel the warmth of the sun on cloudy days but it is still there unchanged and still working around the clock to fulfill its purpose - the same is with God. Does the earth fret that the sun will never reveal itself again?
Over the past year with so much focusing on sickness and death, I took intense comfort in vs. 16. "All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be." How can we lose our peace so quickly when every thought, action and event has already been written down and thought through by God Himself?
The next time you are losing your peace and joy tell yourself this is already written in my book of life and this day alone was ordained by God. This Psalm has nugget upon nugget of the wonderful and perfect workings in our individual lives orchestrated by an individual God.
My son is going into his senior year of college. Over the past year we have had many talks about growing up, relationships, choices and decisions about the future. He shared with me that although I haven't been around physically during his college career there are not many topics that arise that he is unsure as to what my opinion is on the subject. He also knows that any advice I offer him is based on the knowledge I have of who he is and what is best for him. I have known him since his birth and have watched him develop and grow into this person.
Psalm 139 is a similar conversation between David and God. You will be blessed if you truly take this chapter in and absorb the magnitude of who God is in our lives. If we lived out the belief of Psalm 139 we would never fret over anything in our lives. We would take the random and chaos in our lives and know that it was from God who works out every activity under the sun and uses it for our good. We would know that whether we are worshipping or sinning we cannot escape the presence of God. We may not be able to feel His presence but that doesn't change the fact that He is there. We cannot feel the warmth of the sun on cloudy days but it is still there unchanged and still working around the clock to fulfill its purpose - the same is with God. Does the earth fret that the sun will never reveal itself again?
Over the past year with so much focusing on sickness and death, I took intense comfort in vs. 16. "All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be." How can we lose our peace so quickly when every thought, action and event has already been written down and thought through by God Himself?
The next time you are losing your peace and joy tell yourself this is already written in my book of life and this day alone was ordained by God. This Psalm has nugget upon nugget of the wonderful and perfect workings in our individual lives orchestrated by an individual God.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
