Life 101

“No, we speak of God’s secret wisdom, a wisdom that has been hidden and that God has destined for our glory before time began” 1 Co 2:7.

When I was in high school, I always looked forward to Physical Science.  My excitement was due to the fact that what we learned intellectually one day would be hands on the following day.  As the teacher stood up front explaining the results in words, it wasn’t until I applied his knowledge to my experiment that I understood his wisdom.    Through experiments I learned things I would never have known without them.  The rest of the class shared in this newly discovered knowledge that the teacher had been so delighted to share. 

We have the privilege to sit in spiritual classrooms gleaning ancient wisdom from an ancient Teacher.  Through our challenging circumstances we are asked to dissect and cut away the parts of our heart that offer no benefit to the end result.  We allow God the time to instruct and teach ways to apply His wisdom to our experiences in life.  He will show us the proper time for application and faith.  His Word teaches the knowledge of our faith, while our experiences invite us to gain His wisdom through hands-on application.  Step by step we follow His direction in this experiment called life and watch for lessons as we sit perched upon our lab stools.  The temptation is to move ahead in the process and grab the tools we determine will resolve the outcome.  We must wait upon our Teacher and allow Him our full attention in our discoveries.  Through our constant focus and His perfect timing, He will reveal everything required to position us to share in His knowledge and glory.

‘Praise be to the name of God for ever and ever; wisdom and power are His…He gives wisdom to the wise and knowledge to the discerning.  He reveals deep and hidden things; he knows what lies in darkness, and light dwells with him’ Daniel 2:22.

Announcing With Trumpets

“But Haman rushed home with his head covered in grief and told Zeresh his wife and all his friends everything that happened to him.”  Esther 6:12.

We see in Scripture that Haman could not get away from Mordecai quickly enough after Mordecai was honored by the king for spoiling an assassination attempt five years earlier.  No doubt Haman unrolled a story of injustice, anger and bitterness.  He was the victim here and everybody was going to hear every sordid detail!  Things are not that much different in 2012.

Much earlier in life I seemed to tell every aspect of my life to whoever would listen.  I would wear my sack of woes around like a backpack, happy to unload and spread its contents neatly around like a picnic.  If someone else would tell a story with greater woes than mine, I would certainly pack up my burdens and run for cover.  No one was going to rain on my picnic.  Through going deeper with God, I have learned that God doesn’t raise victims… He empowers people.  Mordecai had every reason to feel ignored, neglected and victimized.  The very king whose life he saved was honoring the very person who was trying to wipe out Mordecai’s people.   Nowhere in Scripture do we find Mordecai tooting his own horn, demanding honor and recognition.  In contrast, we find him doing his job without any words of entitlement on his part. Five years later the king developed insomnia and was reminded through his journals of Mordecai’s act of courage.

This life brings moments of burdens and moments of blessings.  We find ourselves rewarded for things we do not deserve, and challenging consequences for things we cannot control.  As Christians we must see ourselves as sitting at the King’s gate with the goal of protecting His message.  We have a role to serve in His kingdom, apart from the accomplishments of others.  We cannot sit at the King’s gate drawing attention to ourselves when things go wrong…we are here to draw attention to our King.  If anyone who has walked this earth deserves to feel like a victim, it is Jesus Christ our Savior.  No one has ever carried a backpack of burdens heavier than the Lamb, yet Jesus remained focused on the King’s work.  While others pointed to themselves, He pointed to the Father.  His reward was not in this temporary place but seated next to God in the eternal kingdom.  He walked out His own words of Matthew 6:1-4.

‘Be careful not to do your acts of righteousness before men, to be seen by them.  If you do, you will have no reward from the Father in heaven…do not announce it with trumpets…to be honored by men.  I tell you the truth, they have received their reward in full…do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving may be in secret.  Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.’

If we are going to announce anything with trumpets, let it be what Jesus did for us instead of what man has done against us.

Gardening with God

“As long as the earth endures, seedtime and harvest, cold and heat, summer and winter, day and night will never cease” Gen. 8:22.

 

In the beginning God set up a perfect and beautiful garden for His beloved children. Because God created this garden everything in the garden prospered and offered mankind a life in communion with God. But mankind’s selfishness and ego driven dreams reached out and tasted what was forbidden. Since that time we have all been digging our own gardens planting our own seeds of dreams and expectations.

From the time I can remember I have had big plans for my life. I have worked hard in my garden to rake, till and plant. In strolling through my garden, rows and rows of dreams were planted under the surface with hopes of full bloom in being a wife and mother. I visualized what would grow from my dreams but some of the fruit that broke through the ground was poisonous for me. A failed marriage followed by a loving marriage, a daughter’s birth following by her drug use. Sometimes I would sit in my garden and camp on the patches that produced no fruit rather than enjoy the growth of the prosperous ones. Every unmet expectation and dashed dream was met with the cold winter of my soul. From the deep disappointments of my heart, seeds of jealousy and bitterness were planted. These produced nothing but weeds that gradually choked out the healthy growth of this Christian’s heart. Out of my exhaustion and failure, I finally laid down my spade and allowed Christ to take over my garden.

Just as the earth endures through seasons, so has my faith. God has rotated and allowed the different seasons in my life. As I survey the rows of blessings in my garden I am humbled by all He does for me. As my eyes fall upon a patch that yields no fruit He has encouraged me in the wait…the fruit will break through the dark soil. As far as any dreams that have not found their way into my little garden I am confident that they would have choked out bigger dreams God had for me.

We must trust that God’s plans are so much better than our plans. Allow the verses of Jeremiah 17:7-8 to spill out upon your garden watering the hopes and dreams of your heart.

‘But blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose confidence is in him. He will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit.’

A Gown Too Large

“Have them bring a royal robe the king has worn” Esther 6:8.

When I was a little girl my mother kept her wedding dress in a plastic garment bag in the back of her closet.  This wedding dress held such power for me in my mind as it represented a day in the future when I would walk down that aisle adorned in white.  I will never forget when Mother allowed me to try it on.  It seemed as if there were a million little covered buttons that closed up the back, and the tiny little sleeves hung well below my fingers.  I couldn’t walk in this beautiful dress because the train was too long to move.  It rustled with every movement my little frame made and my fantasies were too large to be contained in my heart and mind.  I was well aware that this gown was too big for me and was perfectly tailored for my mother’s frame.  I was covered in white and lace…

“For he has clothed me with garments of salvation and arrayed me in a robe of righteousness’ Isaiah 61:10.  In my spiritual closet hangs a gown that is tailored just for me.  It is the Lord’s robe of righteousness that He invites me to try on daily.  He encourages me to grow into that robe and nourishes me to ensure my growth.  The robe is always too big for me to fill, with lots of tiny buttons covered with the flesh that need to be buttoned up tight.   The sleeves of Christ-like character hang below my fingers and the train of growth provides a difficult walk.   With the help of God I grow a little more each day, confidently growing into my robe someday.  Then one wonderful day, I will hold up my spiritual arms as He lowers my robe down over my head and it will find its perfect fit.  Wearing my garment of salvation, it will be the day that the Lord has made for me to slip my arm in His and walk down that aisle towards eternity in my uniquely tailored robe. 

‘I saw the Lord seated on the throne, high and exalted, and the train of his robe filled the temple’ Isaiah 6:1

Megaphones

“What should be done for the man the king delights to honor?  Who is there that the king would rather honor than me?” Esther 6:6

Where are my steel-toed boots when I need them?  When my father-in-law was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s I began an Esther 6:6 tear in the backdrop of my heart.  There were many things that had to be done for Bruce’s dad and everyone knew when any one of them was accomplished.  I became a cheerleader with a megaphone for myself.  Yuck!  This verse is only missing one more number 6 to show who motivates the spirit of this verse…666…Satan and his posse.

God has given each of us a propensity towards His purpose for our lives.  We were not given our talents and gifts based upon our own strength and abilities.  These things come to us as we come to God.  When our tasks are motivated by God’s love and through the power of Christ great things happen in His name.  When we step out of our God-given abilities and spiritual assignments we step in to our flesh.  We use our mouths to gain self-honor instead of using our hearts to show God-honor.  Tucked near the end of the Old Testament are powerful words in Zephaniah:  ‘‘The LORD your God is with you…He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love…’ Zeph. 3:17.  God will determine ‘what shall be done for the man who the King delights in.’ He will look upon our service to others with the knowledge of our heart’s motivation and determine if honor has already been recognized by our own lips.  As John 7:18 explains, ‘He who speaks on his own does so to gain honor for himself, but he who works for the honor of the one who sent him is a man of truth; there is nothing false about him.’  One man speaks while the other man serves. 

‘Here is my servant whom I have chosen, the one I love, in whom I delight…no one will hear his voice in the streets…’ Matthew 12:18- 19

God In the Anonymous

"The scroll of the prophet Isaiah was handed to him.  Unrolling it, he found the place where it is written:  'The Spirit of the Lord is on me, because he has annointed me to preach...He has sent me to proclaim freedom...recovery of sight...release the oppressed, to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor'" Luke 4:17-19.

When Jesus stood up in the synagogue to read He was handed the scroll of the prophet Isaiah.  These scrolls totaled 24 feet in length, and comprised of 17 different sheets of parchment paper rolled up.  The scroll contained 54 columns of text in total, making it most likely awkward to handle at best.  But as Jesus arose, it is written that 'he found the place where it is written.'  I can just picture our Savior unrolling the words of Isaiah and this verse having the divine Light of God shining down, highlighting God's call upon the life of Jesus.  There is was...written in ink...the call upon His life.  No need to flip through the pages and spread them all out.  No need to clear space to scan over the 17 in order to find the verses He was looking for.  The Divine had bookmarked it with His invisible finger. 

My grandmother journaled for over 62 years as she walked with God.  She put these in binders marking them by the calendar year they chronicled.  She had been called by God to write a book on spiritual journaling and had done 98% of the work creating the book.  At age 99, she lived in an assisted living facility, and had brought random years of her journals to keep in her room.  There was no order to the journals that stacked up on her bookshelf.  I felt that God was calling me to finish her book and have it published so I went to her to discuss this possibility.  With her blessing, she allowed me to go through her journals.  I reached for the top journal and within ten minutes my eyes fell upon an entry she had written:

'I must get back to the business at hand, that is the writing of my book.  God assures me that He will send someone to do the work of publishing, etc... I rest on Him.'  Out of 62 years of journaling, the providence of God had placed that journal in that room, on top of that shelf and allowed it to fall open to the confirmation of the call upon my life.  God used the process of finishing her book to call me to my ministry...writing and sharing His word through application.

I once read that coincidences are nothing more than God acting in the anonymous.  That day God zeroed in on the message He wanted to send me, and lit the way for discovery.  Each of us has a call that God has made on our lives to further His kingdom and fulfil our own spiritual destiny.  The more spiritually focused we are on Him, the better discernment we will be able to make for our callings.

Can't Get No Satisfaction

“But all this gives me no satisfaction as long as I see…” Esther 5:13.

Haman was the top official to King Xerxes during the time of Queen Esther.  In an effort to save her people, Esther invited Haman and the King to her banquet.  For certain, she was devising a plan to dispose of Haman since he was the one who made the edict for the Jews’ elimination.  After lots of dining and drinking, it is written that he ‘went out that day happy and in high spirits.’ 

I can just see the bounce in his step and his nose in the air thinking about all the ways he has been honored and favored by the king…such prestige…such status…such power!  As he was rehearsing all his glory in his mind, his ego crashed and burned when he saw Mordecai, the man who would not bow.  He immediately became enraged, stuffed his anger, went home and threw his own party…more boasting…more glory seeking…more drinking.  His wife and friends had to sit there and listen to him go on and on about his greatness.  Then the mood turned and the same old subject clouded over the room, probably for the millionth time…the subject of Mordecai and how he had done his family wrong!  Same song…different verse…with a drunk conductor.
 

We have all experienced it.  We are having a great day rehearsing in our minds how thankful we are for everything our King has given us.  It only takes the mention of someone’s name or a reminder that triggers an experience and off we go.  We open that mental file and begin listing the things that he or she has done, didn’t do, what they have or what they took.  Our peaceful day turns to anger and the resentment in our heart rises above our gratitude.  We allow the mere mention of another to cast darkness in our heart.  The truth of the matter is we have become addicted to that person and live in mental bondage.  ‘Haman was addicted to Mordecai… Haman’s hatred of Mordecai became a mental preoccupation and so caused the most outrageous irony of all:  Haman bowed down to Mordecai…we serve whatever masters us and nothing masters us more completely than the person we feel has wronged us…A person becomes a snare to us any time he or she consumes an excessive and unhealthy space in our thoughts.’ Beth Moore, Esther.
 

Recently, for me it has been my ex-son-in-law who continues to verbally and emotionally attack my daughter.  The mere mention of his name creates anxiety and anger in my heart which has to be denied and surrendered to God.  It is only through dying to self (my anger, my fear and my resentment) and seeing him through God’s eyes that I am able to pray for his heart.  Every time I think of him in a negative way, I capture that thought and ask God to give me a heart of compassion.  It is a lot of draining spiritual work, but with each captured thought it becomes easier and easier.  Every time I give the negative thought to God, He sorts my emotions out and releases me from those feelings.  I am forever grateful that God provides a way out from under the heaviness of my feelings.  He will be obedient to His promises if we are obedient to His commands. 
 

‘For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does.  The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world.  On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds.  We demolish arguments and every pretention that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ’ 2 Co 10:3-5.

Changing Lightbulbs

“His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him, who called us by his own glory and godliness.  Through these he has given his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature and escape the corruption in this world caused by evil desires” 2 Peter 1:3-4.

About a year ago, I had my grandchildren for the night and had just gotten back with them from dinner.  When we pulled up to the house, I was reminded that the outside light had been burned out making it very dark for the little ones.  I asked them to wait on me, but instead they ran up ahead and into the dark.  My granddaughter Kherington tripped over a large rock and fell into a drain opening cutting her chin open.   Rushing her to the emergency room, I silently scolded myself for not changing the bulb.  She could have escaped this experience if I would have just spent a few minutes replacing the light.  Electricity and light is a wonderful source for which we benefit from if we will do our part in connecting with the source. 

Our power Source has everything in life that we will require.  We can participate in that Source by plugging into His divinity, getting the benefits from His power and knowledge.   When we become an active participant in every aspect of our lives we can claim all of the promises.  To be a participant or a part of something means to represent and act on behalf of a greater something or someone.  We stand on solid promises that whatever aspect of life we are experiencing we can escape the temptation to act out of our emotions.  We can act out of God’s character or we can act out of our hurts and fears.  Through participating in one, we escape the other. 

When we are plugged into our flesh, we escape the peace, joy and forgiveness that can be ours in all situations.  When we are plugged into the Spirit, we escape the right to judge, the bitterness and the fears.  We can be screwed into the Source of power lighting our path or we can run up ahead in the darkness.  God has already called each of us out of the darkness into His wonderful light the day He chose us as His children. 

“But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light” 1 Peter 2:9.

Don’t forget to the change your spiritual bulbs before they burn out!

The Price and Joy of Following Jesus

“Early in the morning, Jesus stood on the shore…When they had finished eating, Jesus said to Simon Peter, ‘Simon son of John, do you truly love me…Feed my lambs…Take care of my sheep…Feed my sheep…Follow me!’ John 21:15-19.

The beach was quiet and vacant as the tired fisherman came in from the sea with empty nets.  To no avail they had fished all night until a call came from the shore suggesting that they lower their nets once more.  John realized that it was the voice of their beloved resurrected Teacher.  The yield was too great for any one of them to pull in alone.  After sitting around the fire with full bellies, Jesus turns to Peter meeting him eye to eye.  We cannot know if this was a private conversation, but we certainly can imagine the anxious and humbling emotions Peter must have been experiencing.  Did the warmth of the fire remind Peter that the last fire he stood before was full of denials?  As Jesus passed him the pan of fish, did Peter’s eyes settle on the scars on the hands of Jesus, creating anguish in his sole and sadness in his heart?  Jesus knew that He had a purpose for Peter – to be the rock which His church would be built upon.  Jesus also knew that before Peter could be effective in his service, he would need the forgiving scarred hands of Jesus.  While we cannot know for sure their exchange, we can know with certainty that repentance and forgiveness took place.  That cool and crisp morning as the sun rose up into the sky, so did the call upon Peter’s life.  Jesus spoke the chilling words to him, ‘Follow me.’

Peter knew that to follow Jesus would mean to follow in the suffering for the Name of God.  He was prepared to fish for men regardless of the darkness of the waters ahead of him.  He spoke the message throughout the regions regardless of the consequences.  On one occasion, he was brought before the Sanhedrin and flogged, being commanded to go and never speak in the name of Jesus again.  Bleeding and battered we would expect the Peter who denied Christ three times to be frightened into spiritual amnesia again - but not the new Peter, the rock … the forgiven …the redeemed.  ‘The apostles left the Sanhedrin, rejoicing because they had been counted worthy of suffering disgrace for the Name.  Day after day…they never stopped teaching and proclaiming the good news that Jesus is the Christ’ Acts 5:41. 

If we are to truly follow Jesus we must be prepared to suffer for Him.  This life provides the backdrop for intense suffering in all kinds of ways.  During painful times we share in the fellowship of Christ’s suffering allowing God to rest upon our circumstances.  Witnessing that our faith is sufficient through the power of God brings glory to both God and validation to the message of God.  It doesn’t matter what sinful fire we stood before in the past, God will use us for mighty things in His kingdom once we become reconciled with Him.   ‘Peter had repented, and here Jesus was asking him to commit his life.  Peter’s life changed when he finally realized who Jesus was.  His occupation changed from fisherman to evangelist; his identity changed from impetuous to “rock;” and his relationship to Jesus changed- he was forgiven, and he finally understood the significance of Jesus’ words about death and resurrection.’ Life Application Study Bible, p. 2286.

We all have the same invitation to follow Him all the way through death to resurrection, sharing in His suffering, His death, His resurrection and His eternity!

Denials and Abandonments

“You are not one of the disciples, are you? ‘I am not…’ As Simon Peter stood warming himself, he was asked, ‘You are not one of the disciples, are you?’ He denied it saying, ‘I am not.’ Again, Peter denied it.” John 18: 17, 25, 27.

Peter had followed Jesus for 3 years and had passionately loved Him and stood by His side. He had displayed his affection and commitment to Jesus throughout their shared experiences. His love was never questioned during the time they walked together. But on three different occasions when Peter’s fear was the highest, his actions were the lowest. He went into a self-preservation mode three times denying and abandoning the very One whose life he claimed to live for. He turned his back on the One who had been there for him over and over again. As onlookers I am sure that those people who questioned Peter would have been shocked to hear that Peter loved Jesus. They would have determined that his behavior showed otherwise. Peter was frightened, insecure and gave into his emotions. We will all face situations that require courage, confidence and faith but none of us will be perfect in our responses.

I have always said that God forbid someone judge me for my actions during the most painful seasons of my life. When I look back on the days when I was suffering at the hands of my daughter’s drug use, my behavior was less than stellar. I made choices unflattering to my life and my loved ones, and did not show myself to be the Christian I needed to be. In another situation, I was on the other side of the coin wherein an extended family member chose to deny and abandon their responsibilities in the relationship of a sick family member. Consistently the person warmed her hands by the fire of her own fears and agenda. When confronted, the excuses were many and her involvement was absent. The more time that passes, I understand that like Peter, her behavior had nothing to do with a lack of love. The behavior was a result of her pain, her fear and her past experiences. It has only been since I denied myself (my resentment, unresolved bitterness, etc…) and followed in the example of Christ’s forgiveness, that I have been able to genuinely reconcile my feelings towards her.

Only through God’s love am I able to see that she was a broken person during that time. Christ came back to Peter after the resurrection and gave him grace. Christ had every right to walk away and never see him again, but chose forgiveness and reconciliation. That is our example and our command as we walk in the steps of Jesus. Our actions and attitudes towards others reflect our relationship with God. ‘They claim to know God, but by their actions they deny him.’ Titus 1:16.

Peter went on to do great things for God and established the early church, despite his earlier abandonment and denials. God’s word could have left out this part, but I believe that it was included in the Holy Writ because it is the way of human nature. Tragedy and fear will lean towards the flesh but thankfully we have the Spirit who will reconcile and sort out our emotions.

Expecting Someone Else

“Are you the one who was to come, or should we expect someone else?”  Matthew 11:3.

John the Baptist was the forerunner for Jesus with his sole purpose in life being to spread the message of the coming Messiah.  From sunrise to sunset his proclamations were drenched of hope in a future Savior…every word always about Jesus!  Then one day the darkness overtook John’s life as he was imprisoned by Herod and thrown into the dark despair of a cold and damp prison.  His message continued I am sure of a Savior who would rescue, would bring justice to light and deliver him from his present suffering.  His message began loud and confident but over the weeks or months there was less confidence in his voice.  The passion and zeal that had filled his days were replaced with doubts, discouragement and second guessing.  Prolonged suffering had clouded the truth of his heart.  ‘Where is the Savior?  When will he come?  Has he forgotten me?  Was that even Him?’  He even sent this heart wrenching message through others which haunts my heart for him…for you…for me.   ‘…or should we expect someone else?’  He began to doubt the very person of Jesus.

How often we are forerunners of the message of hope, faith and God’s rescuing love.  From sunrise to sunset the words on our lips testify to our intellectual faith until we are thrown into dark circumstances…the phone call, the diagnosis, or the injustices.  We cry out to God to intervene, to heal, or to move the mountain that is too big to climb.  Our prayers are laced with hope and deliverance in a Savior, but as time goes on our bleeding hearts wonder the same question, ‘Are You my Savior or shall I turn to something else?’  Jesus responded to John’s question with a statement, ‘Blessed is the man who does not fall away on account of me’ (Matthew 11:6).  Instead of keys to the earthly release, John got keys to the kingdom of the Savior.  He had not invested in the wrong Savior - he was just mistaken about the wrong kingdom.  John believed that Jesus would set His kingdom on earth which will happen at the end of time.  But we know through Scripture that we belong to the heavenly kingdom with Christ. ‘Now we know that if the earthly tent we live in is destroyed, we have a building from God, an eternal house in heaven, not built by human hands.  Meanwhile we groan, longing to be clothed with our heavenly dwelling…and know that as long as we are at home in the body we are away from the Lord.’ 2 Co. 5:1-6.

No matter what heart wrenching circumstances which you find yourself in this morning, you can have complete confidence that the God you worship is the Savior who will deliver.  He is who you think He is and nothing will separate you from His love.   He will rescue each of us from our prisons and will bless us for our seasons of suffering just as He did John.  ‘I tell you, among those born of women there is no one greater than John; yet the one who is least in the kingdom of God is greater than he’ Luke 7:28. 

We never have to question whether God will be our Savior...His track record is perfect!

No Need for Fig Leaves

“But the LORD God called to the man, ‘Where are you?’” Gen. 3:9.

Adam and Eve lived in the perfect paradise with their perfect God.  He had not simply provided everything they would need, but He lavished them with everything they could ever want.  It was a beautiful life with an abundance of blessings.  Imagine the late afternoon with the gorgeous sunset sinking into the horizon of the most beautiful place imaginable; their faces basking from the sun’s rays walking and talking with the Lord who created all things.  And then the unimaginable happens…they are convinced that there is more…convinced that their all loving God is holding out on them.  They bite the bait that Satan has lowered into their world, and immediately they realize they have something to hide.  They panic…they blame…they hide…they cover.  Their loving Father strolls down the same path which He has met them on many times before.  But where are they?  They are always here waiting to fellowship with Him.  God calls out with His loving concern, but with sadness in His voice.  Even then, God’s motivation was love instead of condemnation.

How many times have we bitten the bait that Satan lowers into our lives?  How often have we surprised ourselves of the sinful thoughts and destructive bitterness that forces us into the dark?  Satan convinces us that we could have a better life if we just grab the reigns and get on with our plan.  He paints a picture in our hearts of entitlement and resentment against those whom have wounded us.   Whatever the reason that has caused us to crouch and hide will not push God away.  He will never give up on inviting us out of the dark, revealing where we are and coming to us.  Notice that God called out ‘Where?’ not ‘Why?’  His loving question was laced with the desire of going to where they were, meeting them in their shame and covering them with His grace. 

We have the same God that strolled along the path that day looking for His children.  He bends down as we hide in our self-made coverings and reminds us that there is no need for cover…we are already covered by the blood of Jesus Christ.  Because of His Son, we wear righteousness instead of sin, and life instead of death…no need to fig leaves.  He invites us to stand, take His hand and get back on the path of fellowship and intimacy.  As we arise and step out of the darkness of our brokenness we feel loved and cleansed once more.

‘…a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.’ 1 Peter 2:9.

A Question with a Question

“Why is this happening to me?” Gen 25:22. Rebekah

“Why call me Naomi? The LORD has afflicted me; the Almighty has brought misfortune upon me.” Ruth 1:21 – Naomi

“LORD, the one you love is sick…Why didn’t you come? If you had come my brother wouldn’t have died.” John 11:32 – Mary and Martha

“Why, O LORD, do you stand far off? Why do you hide yourself in times of trouble?” Psalm 10:1 – King David

“My God, my God why have you forsaken me?” Matthew 27:46. – Christ Jesus

Since sin entered the world the question of why? has been our battle cry.  For some reason we feel if we can get an explanation it would make us feel better.  Rebekah felt singled out as if no one else suffered (‘happening to me’).  Naomi’s cry basically stated that God could have…but chose not to (‘the Almighty’).  The sisters felt they had special privilege because of their relationship (‘the one you love’).  David had a heart for God but accused Him of breaking His promises of being near (‘far off…hide yourself’).  Even Christ, perfect and sinless, out of His darkest and deepest despair cried out His heart-wrenching battle cry of why? (‘forsaken’).

God understands that it is beyond our human capabilities to suffer and not question. We must remember that Christ was sinless and He, too, questioned the Father.  But Heaven was silent for a few more hours when Jesus cried out in anguish.  Even if God answered Jesus as He hung on the cross, the pain wouldn’t have stopped…the suffering would have still continued…life would have still drained from His body.  But God’s answer was not spoken because the cross was His answer. Our earth focused questions will always be met with God's eternity focused answers. Some of our questions may be answered while others will not.  We cannot see what is up ahead but the destination is the same for all of the sons and daughters of God - eternity.

“But to every why? that has ever ripped your heart in two, remember that God gave us Easter morning!  On that first Easter morning so long ago, God introduced a new why? into our journey.  It’s the most glorious why of all: ‘Why do you look for the living among the dead?  He is not here, he has risen!’ Luke 24:5-6.’” God Loves Broken People – Sheila Walsh

Beauty from Puddles

“But who can endure…Who can stand…For he will be like a refiner’s fire…He will sit as a refiner and purifier of silver; he will purify…and refine them like gold and silver.  Then the LORD will have men who will bring offerings in righteousness…acceptable to the LORD” Malachi 3:2-4.

Bruce and I are presently in Texas visiting his brother and sister-in-law.  Yesterday, we went to a little German town which was peppered with antique shops, gift shops and a few shops of pottery.  As we were walking through the pottery shop the potter was in the back on the wheel creating and diligently working.  My eyes feel upon these beautiful tiny bowls with bursts of crackled colors in the center.  Turns out they are called melted marble pinch pots.  The process is fairly easy…if you are not the marble.  The first step is to choose a plain pottery pot and two marbles.  The marbles are placed in the center of the little pot, put in the 2400 degree kiln allowing the marbles to puddle in the middle of the pot.  Once the marbles are liquid, the bowl is removed and as the puddle cools down, it begins hardening and eventually forms crystalized colorful cracks.  Then an overall glaze is applied by the potter forming a beautiful little Pinch Pot.

Our potter is constantly bending over us designing and forming us … molding and creating us.  We are all given flesh bodies which are primarily similar. However, experiences in life that He allows or sends are like little colorful marbles being placed in the center of our hearts.  Life turns up the heat and puddles our emotions, melting away hopes and dreams.  Suffering turns our firm intellectual faith into an emotional mess wondering if we will ever feel the stability again.  But then time passes, the circumstances of our life cools down and beauty is formed out of puddles.  The Potter takes His healing and resurrecting hands, cups them around our lives and covers our hearts with the protecting seal of the Holy Spirit.  This seal forms a faith that endures…that can stand up under the heat of future firings. 

Before the heat, the marble did nothing but roll around with little function.  After the heat, the marble was infused into a beautiful little dish for which others could be served. 

Rearview Living

“Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.  Put away perversity from your mouth; keep corrupt talk far from your lips.  Let your eyes look straight ahead, fix your gaze directly before you” Prov. 4:24-25.

 Back in the summer, our family vacation was in a townhome which had a garage underneath it.  I had backed into this townhome many times before, but this particular day my perception was off and the side and rear view mirrors weren’t enough.  I ended up scraping the side of my car against the frame of the garage door opening.  I considered that maybe I had become complacent in my perception of backing into the space that was required.  I am not a big fan of backing my car in anywhere.  For me, backing in feels riskier than driving forward.

In my Bible Study this morning the author was considering the same concept only in spiritual terms.  In this life we have all been wounded by another and tend to never let them out of our rearview mirrors.  We constantly are looking back and rehearsing the ways they harmed us or harmed those we love.  We run off the road because our gaze is glancing over our shoulders instead of looking up ahead.  I love the way Sheila Walsh put in her book, God Loves Broken People.  ‘…we let our focus lock onto life’s rearview mirror.  We see so clearly our mistakes and the mistakes of others, our skewed perception of things, and the unhappy turn of events that mark our personal history.  But who can drive anywhere looking in the rearview mirror?  That mirror has been strategically placed over the windshield so our eyes can catch a quick glimpse of All Things Behind, before we return our gaze to All Things Ahead.’

God instructs us to ‘forget what is behind and strain towards what is ahead.’  He guarantees us that living life moving forward is a journey that will actually get us somewhere.  God doesn’t like re-runs.  To slight and slander another is to slight and slander God.  Our gaze must be up ahead so we will not be consumed by the experiences of our past.

‘Don’t dwell on the past, and refuse to camp in the tragedies of your history or the bitterness of past wounds.’  God Loves Broken People, p. 13.

Adorned with Royal Robes

“On the third day Esther put on her royal robes and stood in the inner court of the palace, in front of the king’s hall.  The king was sitting on his royal throne in the hall, facing the entrance.  When he saw Queen Esther standing in the court, he was pleased with her and held out to her the gold scepter that was in his hand.  So Esther approached and touched the tip of the scepter” Esther 5:1-2.

Queen Esther didn’t just get up one morning and get dressed to present herself to the king.  She had fasted, prayed and enlisted others to fast and pray on her behalf for a miracle.  To her dismay, no miracle occurred forcing her to approach the king, whether she liked it or not.  She prepared herself for this moment where everything would ride on his acceptance and favor.  With her thin frame adorned with royal robes she made that long walk down the hallway, and stepped into the inner court of the palace in front of the king’s hall.  And what a sight for sore eyes!

During the last two weeks of my sister’s life, her constant smile was replaced with a distant stare.  Both her mind and body were emptied of any fight and both were surrendered.  During those silent visits, I began remembering my conversation with Beth a few months earlier which brought tears to my eyes, but a smile to my face.  Due to the high dose of several pain blocking narcotics, she seemed on any given day to drift between reality and fantasy.  One day as we were sitting together in the Hospice House, she reached over and grabbed a pad and pen and the fantasy of planning her ‘wedding’ unfolded.   I so appreciated the grace of God painting this picture in her mind and heart with the beautiful colors of a wedding instead of the dark charcoals of a funeral.  Her questions warmed my heart as she would record my answers by drawing little bubbles on the page, much like a stenographer would record every important word.  I still smile when I consider the questions coming from her place in fantasy met with God’s grace.  She asked, ‘Now should we serve hors d’oeuvres in the front of the church?  Will there be a celebration afterwards?  What kind of music shall we play?’ 

Many days were spent planning this wedding with questions and answers that never changed, and the same plans ‘bubbled on the pages of her wedding planner.’ During the last ten days of her life, I couldn’t help but wonder what she was experiencing in those quiet, unreachable days when she was finally bed bound and did not walk.  Was this in-between living holy ground for which no one could enter?  She must have rehearsed this walk a million times much like a bride imagines the day she walks down her aisle.  I cannot help to feel that as she could no longer walk on earth, she was preparing to walk to heaven.  So, in the spirit of all of our planning, our talks and the bubbles on the page, I share my version of her experience in those last days when she couldn’t be reached between the earthly palace and the throne of God.  Much like our Queen Esther preparing to walk and face her king, Beth prepared herself in royal robes for her final walk in the inner courts of Heaven.

“Off in the distance she hears the echo of music playing and soft murmurs of familiar voices.  She has considered this walk a million times in her mind, but this time was different…no fear… no anxiety…no turning back.  She could finally see what was up ahead of her and it was grander than anything behind her.  No turning around this time for she was embracing this wedding day, and would kneel on the altar of eternal commitment – the surrender of total body and spirit to the Him.  She lovingly remembers how her earthly father offered his arm the first time.  But, this time it will be her heavenly Father that offers His arm to walk her down the aisle.  The Director comes to her and whispers that it is time and she hears the music swell.  She nervously steps out into the aisle with a pounding in her heart and a radiance surrounding her.  Her radiance is met with the radiance of her Father.  How beautiful she looks to Him!  She holds a bouquet with the fragrance of her courageous walk during her suffering.  She is dressed in a white linen robe instead of sequins and lace.  Her hair is held back with ribbons of righteousness as she is being made perfect and pure.  Her earthly knowledge is being replaced with pearls of wisdom as everything is becoming more clearly seen in the spiritual realm.  Her vision is still slightly blurred by the thin veil of her earthly inhabitation of flesh.  How excited she must be at the thought of her veil soon to be lifted by the One who adores her.  It will be the perfect timing of God that will determine when her veil is lifted. The delicate petals of her faith are scattered along the aisle from earth to heaven.  The petals are seen from both sides, the view from the earth as petals of inspiration while the view from heaven as petals of fulfilled purposes.

‘When he saw her…standing in the court he was pleased with her and held out to her…his hand’ Esther 5:2.  Her heavenly Father extends His arm in favor and love.  She trustingly reaches out her tiny arm and joyfully slides it into her heavenly Father’s arm.  The music builds in intensity, the processional begins, and so she walks.  As she walks she sees the tears of those she loves who must give away the bride.  The further she walks down that divine aisle, the sobs are replaced by the anticipation and joy of her new family as they welcome her into their eternal one.  While her heart is burdened for the temporary separation of her earthly family, her new wisdom reminds her that one by one they will join her someday.  She remembers that the One on her arm is the Father of all of her loved ones on earth.  His faithfulness to love, carry and comfort them is beyond anything her love could ever offer.  She completes that divine walk with Him and passes over into eternity.”

We will all march down that aisle that bridges earth to heaven, claiming our eternal life with a King who prepared us to be with Him from our birth.

Will You Believe?

“Jesus went throughout Galilee…healing every disease and sickness among the people” Matthew 4:23.

Jesus did not go alone for we know he was accompanied by the disciples.  Over and over again they witnessed the powerful healing of their Teacher and the many miracles that He performed.  They never got tired of seeing a broken man made whole or witnessing a blind person seeing the beautiful landscape for the first time.  I am sure they were sharing their stories and exhorting others to have faith…to believe…to not fear.  No doubt, they had been a part of many celebrations of joy upon those recipients of the miracle.  Their conversations after each miracle must have buzzed with excitement, recounting the moments and their gratitude to be chosen to travel with Jesus.  And yet, when the storm hits just a little while after these celebrations, their faith becomes as absent as the sun on the sea that night.  At first glance, I wonder…I might even judge… and then I remember. "Teacher, don't you care that we're going to drown?" (Mark 4:38).

It had been a nice evening at a wonderful church with sweet Christian people at their Christmas banquet.  As I was giving a speech about the faithfulness of God, and how he brought me through my daughter’s eight year drug use, my daughter was in her home relapsing.  As I was feeling confident draping her five year sobriety safety net around my heart she was breaking her own heart by searching for more pain pills.  As I was hugging the church members goodbye she was embracing the reality of opening that door again to heroin.  Upon discovery of her relapse, the boat jolted, I lost my footing and felt the drenching waters of fear splashing over the sides of my heart.  In an effort to comfort and encourage me my husband asked a staggering and sobering question?  ‘Brenda, will you believe the words on the pages of your speech or will they be forgotten?’  The question splashed a cold bucket of reality over my heart.  The question activated my faith and I chose to ride this storm on the waves of my testimony.  Jesus was in the boat…He had navigated this storm before.  He had docked this rocky ship many times and led it safe to shore. 

In the Gospels Jesus commands us over 21 times to not fear…take heart and to have courage.  He wants us to live in the truth of our testimonies, not to just wear it around like a warm sweater on a calm spring day.  When encapsulating storms hit, we have to know that our faith will be activated like a life preserver and sit behind Jesus as He safely takes us to shore.  Shore may be found on earth or in Heaven but either way, we find ourselves living in the faith for which we encourage others to have.

…and each of us will take heart all the way to Heaven.

Chosen and Called

“But thirty days have passed since I was called to go to the king” Esther 4:11.

Back in the days of Queen Esther, it was considered treason for anyone to approach the king without an invitation.  It was an automatic death sentence unless he showed mercy upon the person by lifting his golden scepter.  It is no doubt that Esther feared for her life – her presence had not been requested in a month, and the king had a full harem of beautiful women at his disposal.  I am certain Esther sat upon her royal couch, her mind spinning for answers to her questions.  ‘Has my king grown tired of me?  Am I no longer beautiful enough for him…smart enough…exciting enough?’ In the hidden places of her heart resided feelings of abandonment, being taken for granted and used.  I can almost picture her with the crown in her lap, sitting in the dark with a broken and fearful heart running her fingers along the rim of the crown.  ‘Why me?  What will become of me?  What did I do wrong?  Does this crown not guarantee me anything?’

As I consider this young woman I also consider myself and every other child of God.  We all experience circumstances that interrupt our lives with life-altering impact…an impact that forces us to access our relationship with our King.  We realize that we have given very little time to the One who deserves our intimate fellowship and worship.  We enjoy our lives with little awareness of the uncountable blessings afforded us from being in His royal family.  Then one day, life unapologetically imposes circumstances upon us and drives us to our knees.  We know we have no other choice but to approach the King, regardless of how long it has been.  But this is where our story splits off from Esther’s story.  As she fears approaching her king with her circumstances, we have the authority and confidence in approaching our King through the golden scepter of the cross.  Our golden scepter is a crossbeam where our Savior suffered, died and rose again affording us continuous fellowship with our King. ‘But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light’ 1 Peter 2:9.

Our King calls us out of the darkness of our heartbreaking circumstances.  He beckons us with love, faithfulness and a hope for an eternal future.  Our crowns do not tarnish, and we do not have to question what will become of us.  Our future is with our King whether on earth or in Heaven.  Our crown guarantees a royal position that can never been taken away.   Someday we will all come out of the darkness of this world and enter into the Light of heaven, our God.

‘There will be no more night.  They will not need the light of a lamp or the light of the sun, for the Lord God will give them light.  And they will reign for ever and ever’ Rev. 22:5.

Self-Made Palaces

“In every province…there was great mourning…When Esther’s maids and eunuchs…told her…she was in great distress...” Esther 4:3-4, 8.

The scene described in Esther 4 makes it difficult to consider that the Queen was clueless as to what was occurring among her own people.  Although there was fasting, weeping and mourning she was so isolated and self-focused in the palace that she was disconnected from the pain of others.  It wasn’t until those closest to her brought it to her attention that she engaged in the suffering of others.  No doubt it was stressful within the walls of the palace but that did not give her a pass on being aware of the suffering of her people.

How many times do we build palace walls with the busyness of our lives?  How is it that we become so self-focused that we lose the connection with those around us who are hurting?  It took Esther’s maids and eunuchs to inform her of what was occurring within her own people.  We also have a messenger who points out the suffering of others if we invite Him to guide our lives – the Holy Spirit.  The Spirit is the one who brings the pain of others to our mind encouraging us to reach out…to engage…to connect to the challenges of others.

We were never meant to live in self-made palaces with walls of isolation and gates of self-focus.  We were made to live in the courts of our King where we place the needs of others ahead of ourselves.  We were created to be the hands and feet of God, sharing His love and comfort with a hurting world.  We cannot be self-appointed queens and kings who sit upon our throne unaware and unattached to the suffering of others.

The Vessel of Joy

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.  Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything” James 1:2-4.

This passage must be framed around the definition of biblical joy.  Joy is the settled assurance that God is in control of every detail, the quiet confidence that everything is going to be alright and the determined choice to praise God in spite of the circumstances. 

Yesterday I met my daughter half way between college and home for breakfast.  She and her boyfriend had plans of an engagement after graduation in the spring.  Out of the blue she received a phone call from him ending their relationship.  This relationship has been a healthy one with a guy who has a wonderful heart.  Unfortunately, he has begun to question his feelings forcing them to be apart.  Three years ago another boyfriend was killed in a motorcycle accident and two extremely unhealthy relationships followed.  It has been a long journey and continues to be.

Although devastated, her words yesterday reminded me of this passage and the definition of biblical joy.  As tears streamed down her cheeks, she commented that she has been through so much before age 23.  But as she looked up, those beautiful green eyes held peace instead of fear…assurance instead of panic…and trust in God regardless of the outcome.  She is taking everything to God each night and has the confidence that He will move her beyond this.  The trials she has endured at such an early age have developed an amazing ability to persevere, affording her great spiritual growth.

There are so many people on the other side of this screen whose lives have been devastated, dreams seem dashed and hopes have vanished.  God has a remedy for everyone’s pain and a plan for everyone’s future.  There is but a thin veil between heaven and earth, and as Christians the goal is exiting this world and entering into eternity with God.  As we walk towards that veil, shedding more and more of our fleshly covering we develop a more righteous and lasting garment.  Hopefully, we become mature and complete in our faith with each trial.  Through spiritual maturity we can face the things that break our hearts and replace them with the One who promises more.  ‘Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.  All of us who are mature should take such a view of things’ Phi 3:13-14.

Biblical joy keeps us moving forward instead of allowing our emotions to keep us stuck in our pain.  Our prize is not of this world, but biblical joy can be the vessel that gets us there.

Sack of Woes

“Honest scales and balances are from the LORD; all the weights in the bag are of his making” Proverbs 16:11.

Back in the days of the Old Testament, ‘merchants carried stones of different sizes with them to weigh and measure quantities for silver for payment.’ NIV Study Bible, p. 980. It was essential for the exact weight to be appropriated for each person to get what they deserved.

We are no different as we gather with others bringing our stones of different sizes. We look to others and determine that our stones of burden weigh more and deserve more attention. We drag our spiritual bags up to our self-made scales, throwing them on the surface. We determine that the challenges of others are merely pebbles and that somehow the weightiness of our hearts will always trump others. We measure our circumstances against the circumstances of others with scales that are out of balance. The reality of our life is built with the preception of our mind.
 

God either sends or allows the challenges in our lives to grow us spiritually, letting the circumstances do its work in transforming us more in Christ likeness. He alone determines what we face and of what our lives are comprised according to what we need. We allow our bag of burdens to become an anchor around our necks, bringing others down with us. We were never meant to drag a sack of woes behind us, but to surrender our burdens to the LORD with honest and balanced hearts. It is only through this surrender that we come in for the Matthew 11:28-29 blessing. ‘Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest…For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.’

Our bags will carry the same lessons until we learn once and for all that God is equitable…fair…and His love endures forever.

A Throne for One

“…thrones were set in place, and the Ancient of Days took his seat.  His throne was flaming with fire, and its wheels were all ablaze…The court was seated and the books were open” Daniel 7:9-10.

In picturing the above passage I am completely humbled and awestruck in the beautiful image described.  The thought of God as the ultimate Judge is appealing on so many levels.  This world is not fair…not equal…and can be downright mean. 

This past week I have had many ‘opportunities’ in passing judgment on another.  One of my daughters has been the target of unadulterated meanness…revenge…spite. It is not an exaggeration to state that I wanted to be that person that marched up to that throne and took my seat.  My anger flamed as I watched my daughter undeservingly being placed in an overwhelming situation.  My emotions were all ablaze as I recalled and recounted the infractions to God during my pleas for justice.

When our Father wants to encourage us and comfort our out of control emotions He really delivers.  This morning as my emotions lay raw God took His mighty seat upon that throne of justice and offered me a seat in His court.  He slowly opened His book and gave me the relic I needed to tuck closely to my heart.  He opened His mouth and the words flowed like life into my heart. ‘Nothing in all creation is hidden from My sight.  Everything is uncovered and it all lays bare before My eyes and this man must face me in the future and talk to me about this atrocity against My daughter.’ (My version of Hebrews 4:13)  Then the Ancient of Days looked intensely into my eyes and lovingly said, ‘My child, you do not sit upon this throne.  You do not repay insult with evil, you are my child and through Me you are capable of more.  It is my hand that will discipline and my discipline that will justify.'  ‘The Lord will judge his people.  It is a dreadful thing to fall into the hands of the living God.’ Hebrews 10: 30.

As much as I love my daughter and wish to protect her I am reminded this morning that I am her guardian on earth, but she is the royal daughter of the Ancient of Days who loves her more than I ever could. 

Speaking Our Language

“Then on the thirteenth day…the royal secretaries were summoned.  They wrote out in the script…in the language of each people…with the order to destroy, kill and annihilate” Esther 3:12-13.

Once upon a time there were two kings, the king of the evil kingdom and the King of the righteous Kingdom.  There was no doubt that one king was inferior to the other, although the evil king certainly had his ways which were highly effective.  The evil king was a coward and did his bidding through regular people who had the free will to respond and live by either kingdom.

We are those people who live among two kings, being summoned by both and used as instruments by either.  Satan will work through people and circumstances to bring strife and bitterness between fellow residents on this earth.  He is well aware of what messages to send into our minds… ‘Remember what she did to you?  Remember how he treated your children?  You need to destroy the thought of reconciliation with her!  You need to kill your desire to forgive the one who doesn’t deserve your grace.’  These are the scripts of our minds, words spoken by the evil king to our hearts.  If the words coming out of our mouths are anything but love and grace, the evil king has won that round.  He has written a script for which we are following and we become his mouthpiece, either through words or actions.

If we are going to be summoned and be instruments at the hands of kings let it be the One who rules with love from a throne of grace.  Let us replace the language of our hurts with the voice of our Healer.

‘For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks…For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned’ Matthew 12:34, 37.