I have always loved the story A Christmas Carol brilliantly written by Charles Dickens. It is the story of a man who was visited by the ghost of Christmas past, present and future. I sit here this morning continuing to ponder life in past Decembers. Just as Scrooge in the story was time traveled to a few decades before, my mind also travels back a few decades ago. Shopping for Christmas was a paralleled set of train tracks…one where I was a confident mommy choosing gifts to be opened by my two young children…but the other set of tracks being a terrified mommy that my daughter would not survive drugs to enjoy the gift’s I had bought for her. There is nothing joyful about choosing presents for someone who is lost to their life and has chosen to be absent from their family. No gift made sense since nothing she was doing made sense. The smallest things represented the most fearful things. When a string of lights burned out, I fell apart as it represented my fear that she wouldn’t survive the drugs. When my other two little children would shake their gifts in joy and anticipation, little did they know my foundation was being shaken apart. But finally, out of sheer survival of despair I gave myself the greatest gift I ever could…the gift of surrender to the only One who could redeem her life.
I read something this morning in Lysa TerKeurst’s book, ‘It’s Not Supposed to be This Way’ that really hit home during my visit from the ghost of Christmas past. She writes, ‘Sometimes, you just have to let people you love have their journey on one side of the street and have your journey on the other side of the street…We make brief visits to normalcy, but there’s a lot of emotional debris to which we must tend.’ p 90. So that is what we did…we had brief visits to normalcy and allowed her to journey on her own side. But with that came God’s promise that not only was He present with us, but He was present with her on the other side of her street. He was doing an amazing work in her heart even though we couldn’t see it. But we trusted Him, and we trusted the process even when we didn’t see any evidence of redemption. But boy did it come, and it came in with a divine vengeance! God didn’t just save her… He saved all of us through her delivery. She is a walking miracle and a talking testimony to the saving power of Jesus no matter what the circumstances are. When we see death, he sees life. When we see our brokenness He sees our wholeness. When we fear darkness, darkness fears Him.
I can tell you what the ghost of Christmas present looks like as we approach this season in 2018. It is not just a picture of Kristen’s years of clean living, but a picture of her meeting other addicts to encourage and sponsor them. It is a reality of her three adoring children and husband huddling around the tree tearing open the Christmas gifts. It is a fulfilled promise from God that tears do dry…hearts do heal…families are reconciled. Whatever your ghost of Christmas present is whispering in your fearful heart, don’t forget there is always a ghost of Christmas future with beautiful days up ahead. Trust God’s process… trust God’s perfect plan... and look for God’s presence everyday.
“Strengthen the feeble hands, steady the knees that give way; say to those with fearful hearts, ‘Be strong, do not fear; your God will come, he will come with vengeance; with divine retribution he will come to save you.’” Isaiah 35:3-4.
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