Withholding Out Of Love

“Then the mother of Zebedee’s sons came to Jesus with her sons and, kneeling down, asked a favor of him. ‘What is it you want?’ he asked. She said, ‘Grant that one of these two sons of mine may sit at your right and the other at your left in your kingdom.’ ‘You don’t know what you are asking.’ Jesus said to them, ‘Can you drink the cup I am going to drink?’ ‘We can,’ they answered.” Matthew 20:20-22

Positioned in this scene is a mother who wants the best for her sons. She approaches Jesus whom she believes will be king one day and desires to align her sons in the best possible position in His kingdom. She was speaking more of an earthly kingdom while Jesus was speaking of His heavenly kingdom to come. Jesus was going to be crowned but not with jewels. He was going to be set high above man but on a cross not a throne. What she was asking for would ultimately involve the suffering and deaths of both sons. We would never ask God for this but rather beg Him to spare their lives.

The importance of this passage is in the understanding of the person kneeling down. When we pray we should never assume we know what is best for either our own lives or the lives of our loved ones. We cannot know the plans God has for our lives just as this prideful mother didn’t know her request for both sons could end in death.

My grandmother began praying for each of us before we were even born. She prayed first and foremost with the Matthew 6:33 principle. ‘Seek first His kingdom and His righteousness and all these things will be given to you.’ She sought the things of God for each of us believing with absolute conviction that based on this pursuit we would be given everything to be successful. She did not pray for an easy life for us but a spiritually meaningful life with deep fellowship with God. Our prayers should always begin with ‘Thy will be done’ as instructed in the Bible. This poor mother received her heart’s desire for her boys to be in high standing in the kingdom but the cost of the desire was as huge as the reward. James died a martyr while John was banished to the island of Patmos.

‘Sometimes we go to the Lord asking for favors without understanding what we are really saying. We may feel crushed when he says no, but he only withholds out of love. He has the wisdom of all eternity at his disposal and is a wise judge. Ask him to reveal his perspective. It will make all the difference.’ Women of Faith Study Bible, p.1878